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Bullshit your mum told you and you still believe it

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Comments

  • If you pick your nose your head will.cave in.
  • "You can make wine from anything son." I've tried many, many untraditional ideas.
    In a few weeks i'm picking up some blood for black pud, so have decided to pick a little extra up to make blood wine.
  • If you throw away food your always be hungry 
  • Eat your crusts !

    If not, your hair will never curl !

    ( Thank the lawd for that !)
  • Was always told by my old dear, "if you play with your belly button, your bum will fall off" now I can't stand touching it or anyone else. Cheers mum. 
  • edited October 2020
    That Chris Fartsmell is a decent feller
  • “If you step on a crack, you’ll break your mother’s back”

    Still avoid cracks on paving stones now. Not that it’s going to break my mum’s back considering she’s been dead for 8 years.
  • WSS said:
    “If you step on a crack, you’ll break your mother’s back”

    Still avoid cracks on paving stones now. Not that it’s going to break my mum’s back considering she’s been dead for 8 years.
    Not sure to like or lol this. So have a quote instead. 
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  • edited October 2020
    cafcfan said:
    While my Mum was inclined to use many of the aforementioned daft sayings, she was more well known for just all round silliness.  Asking esoteric questions like "do sheep eat all night" or telling my Dad that sex was not on offer because her thumbs hurt.  (The mind boggles.)

    The carrots thing is interesting.  It was of WW2 origin because carrots were actually available.  But if you had a vitamin A deficiency (and you'd think almost all vitamins were marginal at that time) then you could develop "night blindness" and eating carrots would correct that - but only back to regular night vision levels.
    Would you put your all in to sex if your thumbs hurt? Don't you think it would be a bit distracting?  The unanswered question here, of course, is what were you doing listening at the keyhole of your parents' bedroom?

    A WW2 story I've heard about carrots and being able to see in the dark is that it was a bit of disinformation put out by our Government to disguise our use of radar.
  • My mum used to say long and thin goes right in but short and thick does the trick.
  • WSS said:
    “If you step on a crack, you’ll break your mother’s back”

    Still avoid cracks on paving stones now. Not that it’s going to break my mum’s back considering she’s been dead for 8 years.
    I’d forgotten this one. However, my mother informed me that there was a different outcome. If I did it too much, one would open up and I fall into a gaping hole.
  • cafcfan said:
    While my Mum was inclined to use many of the aforementioned daft sayings, she was more well known for just all round silliness.  Asking esoteric questions like "do sheep eat all night" or telling my Dad that sex was not on offer because her thumbs hurt.  (The mind boggles.)

    The carrots thing is interesting.  It was of WW2 origin because carrots were actually available.  But if you had a vitamin A deficiency (and you'd think almost all vitamins were marginal at that time) then you could develop "night blindness" and eating carrots would correct that - but only back to regular night vision levels.
    Would you put your all in to sex if your thumbs hurt? Don't you think it would be a bit distracting?  The unanswered question here, of course, is what were you doing listening at the keyhole of your parents' bedroom?

    A WW2 story I've heard about carrots and being able to see in the dark is that it was a bit of disinformation put out by our Government to disguise our use of radar.
    Well all I can say is ........Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?
  • I still believe my Dad blew up balloons which floated upwards, which apparently you need helium for - still confused about this
  • Addickted said:
    Don't sit on a cold wall or you'll get piles.

    I had no idea what piles were.


    My mum's was the opposite - don't sit on the radiator or you'll get piles.
  • iaitch said:
    Did your dad have a squeaky voice?
    His dad is Joe Pasquale
  • edited October 2020
    Don’t handle broken eggshells as you’ll get warts on your hands. 
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  • Don’t handle broken eggshells as you’ll get warts on your hands. 
    Mine similar - egg white gives you warts. Genuinely still have an aversion to cracking eggs. Never touch inside the shell and balance the pointy ends in my palm to throw in the bin.
  • Essex_Al said:
    Sunday mornings:-

    Me:  where's Dad
    Mum:  gone to church!

    It took me years to work out why he came home reeking of booze and fell asleep straight after dinner!
    In our family it was known as “Granddad’s gone to see a man about a dog”!
  • Essex_Al said:
    Sunday mornings:-

    Me:  where's Dad
    Mum:  gone to church!

    It took me years to work out why he came home reeking of booze and fell asleep straight after dinner!
    In our family it was known as “Granddad’s gone to see a man about a dog”!
    I've only ever known that phrase as a euphemism for going to the lavvy.
  • When my parents were going out somewhere, and I would asked where they were going, their answer sometimes was "to see a man about a dog".  I was always disappointed when they came home without a dog.
  • Ibberg's post reminded me of the occasion  when someone came into work with a cold, the question would be asked ,"How did you catch that?  Getting out of a warm bed, and walking home?".
  • Make sure you dry yourself properly after a bath otherwise your bones will ache when you are older.

    After saying this for quite a bit to my own kids, I realised my mum was just trying to make sure I dried myself properly. 

    I am sure she thought  it was true though 
  • My mum said sitting on damp grass could give you piles. And she had some interesting questions - if there are so many sheep in this country why is beef so expensive?! 🤔
  • Seems sitting on anything gives you piles, I was brought up on sitting on cold concrete gives you them.
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