It’s a cross I have to bear , I live half my life stuck on a bog reading CL In case you’re worried still no sign of solids , all I want for Christmas is a solid one wiper . Andrex and Cadbury’s shares to plummet in the New Year
It’s a cross I have to bear , I live half my life stuck on a bog reading CL In case you’re worried still no sign of solids , all I want for Christmas is a solid one wiper . Andrex and Cadbury’s shares to plummet in the New Year
Christmas Eve used to be the big pub day for me and my mates. Star and garter for an evening of slightly cheaper ale. Christmas day typically starts with the mass clear out normally reserved for the children's toy cupboard
It’s a cross I have to bear , I live half my life stuck on a bog reading CL In case you’re worried still no sign of solids , all I want for Christmas is a solid one wiper . Andrex and Cadbury’s shares to plummet in the New Year
Codeine makes you solid mate, try it.
Does work but can be addictive. Solpadeine pain killers can do the job on a temporary basis.
I’d rather it came out than stayed in , you should know all about that Elf’s !! Just need a firming of the stool so I don’t have to wipe and do a bog roll each Richard
Christmas Eve used to be the big pub day for me and my mates. Star and garter for an evening of slightly cheaper ale. Christmas day typically starts with the mass clear out normally reserved for the children's toy cupboard
I’d rather it came out than stayed in , you should know all about that Elf’s !! Just need a firming of the stool so I don’t have to wipe and do a bog roll each Richard
Senna and Lactulose does the trick. The recipe for the bowels working properly.
Seriously. Does anyone know more about any other person’s bowel movements than they do about OohAahs? Every time he tells us he’s on the loo reading... too much thinking of his gold plated shite in his palatial Essex barn conversion. Stop!! We don’t want to know you don’t have solids. Please. 😊
But we do, the Queen has said she will make the day he does a Bank Holiday! 😉
My poop-hoop has taken a battering today already, with two large anaemic looking loads. I'm not a specialist in this thing, but my guess would be as much as 2kg of matter. Could be a new household record.
It’s a cross I have to bear , I live half my life stuck on a bog reading CL In case you’re worried still no sign of solids , all I want for Christmas is a solid one wiper . Andrex and Cadbury’s shares to plummet in the New Year
You could try a teaspoonful or two of Bisto twice day. It may not cure it, but will certainly thicken it up.
My bowels are regular as clockwork, regardless of Christmas. One roll up and a coffee and ten minutes later a perfect snake like deposit is dropped. No pushing, no grunting effort. Sit down, evacuation complete, quick wipe, pants up and on with my day. The key? Vegan diet. It’s a beautiful thing.
Worried that I haven't heard from @oohaahmortimer on here for a bit... Just checking in...
Appreciate your rightful concern Christmas Day pressure of not being on the khazi cos it’s opening presents time for the kids has thrown me in to turmoil .
7-9am is a big part of the days pooing procedures. So I had to hold it in and throw my bodily functions in to turmoil . Secret Santa delivered two 850g Cadbury’s Dairy Milk that was delved in to for breakfast before Christmas dinner hit home .. I’m now on the pan at a time of day that is not in the usual regime but it’s required cos turkey sarnies and warmed up roast potatoes are calling . could be a long night tonight
Worried that I haven't heard from @oohaahmortimer on here for a bit... Just checking in...
Appreciate your rightful concern Christmas Day pressure of not being on the khazi cos it’s opening presents time for the kids has thrown me in to turmoil .
7-9am is a big part of the days pooing procedures. So I had to hold it in and throw my bodily functions in to turmoil . Secret Santa delivered two 850g Cadbury’s Dairy Milk that was delved in to for breakfast before Christmas dinner hit home .. I’m now on the pan at a time of day that is not in the usual regime but it’s required cos turkey sarnies and warmed up roast potatoes are calling . could be a long night tonight
Seriously. Does anyone know more about any other person’s bowel movements than they do about OohAahs? Every time he tells us he’s on the loo reading... too much thinking of his gold plated shite in his palatial Essex barn conversion. Stop!! We don’t want to know you don’t have solids. Please. 😊
In tears of laughter reading this! What a place this is!
Bit of a missed opportunity here. Alongside the popular ‘rate my plate’ there could be a ‘rate my faeces’. A turdometer could be used to show excremental scores between @AddickUpNorth perfect vegan roll and @oohaahmortimer chocolate based sloppy mess.
I’m pretty certain that in some dark corner of the ‘net there are sites for turd pics @SheffieldRed but not sure if CL is ready for such ‘specialist’ submissions. If the mods allow it I’ll leave out the sweet corn for a couple of days as I find they spoil the aesthetics of a truly beautiful example.
Bit of a missed opportunity here. Alongside the popular ‘rate my plate’ there could be a ‘rate my faeces’. A turdometer could be used to show excremental scores between @AddickUpNorth perfect vegan roll and @oohaahmortimer chocolate based sloppy mess.
The final would be between a spanner’s shirt & a nigel’s shirt.
I’m pretty certain that in some dark corner of the ‘net there are sites for turd pics @SheffieldRed but not sure if CL is ready for such ‘specialist’ submissions. If the mods allow it I’ll leave out the sweet corn for a couple of days as I find they spoil the aesthetics of a truly beautiful example.
Bit of a missed opportunity here. Alongside the popular ‘rate my plate’ there could be a ‘rate my faeces’. A turdometer could be used to show excremental scores between @AddickUpNorth perfect vegan roll and @oohaahmortimer chocolate based sloppy mess.
Good idea, we can put it on the members only for privacy. @oohaahmortimer can get the ball rolling....so to speak.
Bit of a missed opportunity here. Alongside the popular ‘rate my plate’ there could be a ‘rate my faeces’. A turdometer could be used to show excremental scores between @AddickUpNorth perfect vegan roll and @oohaahmortimer chocolate based sloppy mess.
Bit of a missed opportunity here. Alongside the popular ‘rate my plate’ there could be a ‘rate my faeces’. A turdometer could be used to show excremental scores between @AddickUpNorth perfect vegan roll and @oohaahmortimer chocolate based sloppy mess.
This is perfect to go alongside rate my plate , it’s important to see that plate on its full journey to properly score it & to truly see if it had full balance.
Bit of a missed opportunity here. Alongside the popular ‘rate my plate’ there could be a ‘rate my faeces’. A turdometer could be used to show excremental scores between @AddickUpNorth perfect vegan roll and @oohaahmortimer chocolate based sloppy mess.
This is perfect to go alongside rate my plate , it’s important to see that plate on its full journey to properly score it & to truly see if it had full balance.
Comments
In case you’re worried still no sign of solids , all I want for Christmas is a solid one wiper .
Andrex and Cadbury’s shares to plummet in the New Year
Just need a firming of the stool so I don’t have to wipe and do a bog roll each Richard
With you all the way on preference.
Fruit flies like a banana.
I am now ravenous.
You could try a teaspoonful or two of Bisto twice day. It may not cure it, but will certainly thicken it up.
Christmas Day pressure of not being on the khazi cos it’s opening presents time for the kids has thrown me in to turmoil .
So I had to hold it in and throw my bodily functions in to turmoil .
Secret Santa delivered two 850g Cadbury’s Dairy Milk that was delved in to for breakfast before Christmas dinner hit home ..
I’m now on the pan at a time of day that is not in the usual regime but it’s required cos turkey sarnies and warmed up roast potatoes are calling .
could be a long night tonight
@oohaahmortimer can get the ball rolling....so to speak.
can I throw into the ring (pun intended)
view my poo
or
like my shite
Rule my stool