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farting

sillav nitram
Posts: 10,169
serious question, do you fart a lot. i don't mean pull my finger for fun farting, just everyday farting. i asked my doctor once and he said we all fart about 40 times a day but i think i do more than that.
it's particularly aggravating when i go to my meditation group twice a week. i seem to spend my whole evening squeezing my butt cheeks together, so i don't let out a stream of loud farts, makes it near impossible to meditate.
it's particularly aggravating when i go to my meditation group twice a week. i seem to spend my whole evening squeezing my butt cheeks together, so i don't let out a stream of loud farts, makes it near impossible to meditate.
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Comments
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Drop the kids off at the pool before going to meditation?2
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I love farting0
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Better out than in.0
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I think 40 a day is stretching it....1
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I wonder who measured the 40 farts a day? Do you think it's a government statistic backed up by research and confirmed by a select committee?
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It was part of their happiness survey.1
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Regulated by Offguff14
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I love doing a good fart... short and slight / loud and proud doesnt matter - thankfully never followed through!!0
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It's a male ritual
1 2 3 4 I declare far War
Great fun in a lorry cab where you can lock the passenger window
Bad when the guy next to you can fast on demand and find a smell Satan would rebuke as to evil1 -
Possibly something you are eating which is affecting you so badly. My wife avoids eating onions which causes her to have massive amount of flatulence.0
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I would say that I am a fairly clumsy milliner - but don't think I reach the heady heights of 40 a day.0
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Onions really do set me off as well... Wasnt able to enjoy a fart when I had one, now I eat them deliberately at timesJayajosh said:Possibly something you are eating which is affecting you so badly. My wife avoids eating onions which causes her to have massive amount of flatulence.
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There is nothing funnier than a fart in a quiet classroom - FACT.2
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I fart loads and love it, especially in the morning during first pee. Out of interest I am going to record how many per day for the next week. Any more takers for this study group? The more people involved will give us a truer answer and make sillav feel better (or maybe worse).1
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When you fart and let out 2 or 3 notes, is that counted as one fart?
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Yup I'm in...scidbox said:I fart loads and love it, especially in the morning during first pee. Out of interest I am going to record how many per day for the next week. Any more takers for this study group? The more people involved will give us a truer answer and make sillav feel better (or maybe worse).
Apologies to those around me at Charlton tomorrow when I do a fart and have a lil giggle followed by quietly going 35... Its a Science project!!2 -
if your a woman then youve turned me on2
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How many do you do in your sleep?0
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Farting in the bath is awesome as you hope everyone downstairs heard it?1
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Nope fraid Im a fella!!Dave2l said:if your a woman then youve turned me on
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I'm trying to reduce my 40-a-day-habit by using a rechargeable USB-electronic farter4
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Don't know if I should be admitting this but I once considered compiling a C60 tape of farts and belches to playback during times of depression.
As a kid, nothing could beat the sheer hysterical, subversive pleasure of farting in Church0 -
Have you tried fart tennis? Person 1 farts to serve, Person 2 returns serve with a fart, back to Person 1... play continues until one player can't summon a fart or shits his/her pants/knickers. A great game that calls for strategy and control.10
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I downloaded a sleep talk app that records any noise made during the night but when listening to it the next morning it would appear I had spent the night talking out my arris.
You can't beat a good old morning jam tart. Best of the day and usually my loudest.2 -
My ex lives not far from a tidal river (West Looe) where seaweed sometimes lies and rots for a while. The first night I slept with her the wind was in the right direction, and in the middle of the night I woke up and there was this overwhelming stench. I wondered how I could raise the subject as she clearly needed to see a doctor. I chickened out, and didn't find out until next time it happened and she mentioned it herself.1
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But to answer your question. I don't fart. Never have, never will.1
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Love farting. Love the word "fart" - beautifully expressive. I know its childish but dropping a really offensive one just before you get out of a lift and someone elese gets in is wonderfully satisfying. Similary on escalators.2
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Can't be true, Wmt !Wheresmeticket? said:But to answer your question. I don't fart. Never have, never will.
When I was little , my Dad told me that the only person who doesn't fart is the Queen.
Not sure how he knew that though....
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Could it have been a term of endearment for your mum? :-)Fanny Fanackapan said:
Can't be true, Wmt !Wheresmeticket? said:But to answer your question. I don't fart. Never have, never will.
When I was little , my Dad told me that the only person who doesn't fart is the Queen.
Not sure how he knew that though....1