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Tight fisted gits

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  • Out for drinks after work, mate who was notoriously tight surprised everyone and said ‘let’s go to one of the dodgy pubs down Shorditch’. So off a group trotted down there.

    After the first parade the girl went round with her pint glass, and everyone put their 50p (you can tell this is an old story!) in apart the bloke whose suggestion it was, who stood primly with his hands in his pockets. She said something to him and he come out with the legendary line “love, I’ve just popped in for a quiet drink after work. If you want to take you clothes off then that’s entirely up to you”.

    haha, proper genius!
  • They have redesigned the stamps so it is harder to get them off without them breaking up.
    But not impossible ..................................
  • I can’t be the only one reading this scratching my head thinking “isn’t that your sister?”
    snap and thought it must be a milwall fan
  • Carter said:

    I was first thing this morning until my brain engaged and realised it was his wife's sister
    No!

    It’s my wife’s brothers now ex-wife!
  • Got another one - more Brother-in-Law stuff later.

    My mate had a Father-in-Law whose party trick was going to restaurants and having a slap-up meal - and then announcing to the waitress that he had lost his wallet and couldn’t pay.

    I once saw him pull this trick off in a cafe I happened to be in and he could not give a toss, he ordered $60 worth of food and then called the waitress over and announced, “I have got a bit of a problem....”

    Because he was a really well-spoken and well presented bloke people fell for it all the time!
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  • Fella at work won

    I can’t be the only one reading this scratching my head thinking “isn’t that your sister?”
    And am i the only one who started singing to myself...."Your sister is your mother,your father is......."?
  • cafc999 said:

    Worked with 2 lads on a job where the canteen was heavily subsidised, if my memory serves me right a cup of tea cost 10p. Anyway we was all on good money and one day one of the them bought in a kettle so that he could make his own tea as he thought 10p was a piss take..!!

    Very similar to an old office I worked in, 10p for a coffee and at the end of the year it all went behind the bar at the office work do anyway, it was just 10p to avoid people taking the piss and getting coffee they wouldn't drink etc.

    One bloke used to come in early, sneak into the office cupboard for the prefilled cups for the machine and make himself a coffee w using that and the kettle. Either that or nick someone's granules if they'd bought in better stuff than the machine one for themselves.
  • They have redesigned the stamps so it is harder to get them off without them breaking up.
    That's why he stopped steaming them off and started cutting them out, leaving the backing on.
  • the other one that grates me and is probably quite common is you all meet up for a night out, the usual meeting place/1st stop is a pub of some kind for arguments sake its a wetherspoons, hell always get 1st round as everyone will be on a pint, fast forward 4 hours then when someone elses rounds its oh ill have a double spirit and mixer.
  • It's not strictly 'tight fisted' but was my silliest argument ever over money. I bought a return ticket from Blackheath to London many years ago. In the evening, I returned to Ladywell in the evening to meet a friend for a beer. I never crossed my mind that I should pay an excess fare Lewisham as I was on a different line. Sure enough, I got stopped at the barrier and told that I needed to pay an excess fare. I apologised and offered the extra 2p or whatever it was at that time. But, the officious guy at the exit (there were no barriers then) told me that I was guilty of defrauding British Rail and that I would be arrested. I was held by 3 staff while the police were called. The policeman eventually turned up and had a word with the over-officious ticket man. The policeman came over to me and said that I had refused to pay the excess fare. I said that was nonsense and had offered to pay it more than once. The policeman then explained that the bloke was a pain in the backside and regularly called the police for no reason. I was told to leave. As I wandered off belatedly to the pub, I realised that I still hadn't paid the 2p excess fare. I am not sure I have been back to Ladywell Station since.
  • Have also dealt with a manager at work who I'm reliably informed asked a restaurant at the end of an expensed meal for a calculator to take 2% off their service charge as they "only deserved 8%, not 10%".

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  • Oh how this brought back memories of my days working all over the uk in the 70's and 80's having to stay in B&B's before the likes of travelodge etc were invented lol
    Bit of a shame in a way, a lot more character in B&Bs etc.

    Must admit I like knowing a Premier Inn will be cheap and still be clean, have hot water, decent sheets etc though!
  • The 'tight fisted beer monkey' has to be one of the worst!

    You know the sort. Happily join in a round, but conveniently go 'MIA' when it's their shout!

    The shame of it! You know who you are!!

    {Roun.da.phobic} Someone who is never there when their round comes around
  • I can’t be the only one reading this scratching my head thinking “isn’t that your sister?”
    Er, no. His brother in law is his wife's brother - and the brother had a wife. So relation at all. The thing I was going to ask was ..........would ya or even, did ya ??
  • Well I misread that title.
  • On a slightly different topic & maybe should be a thread of its own..........tipping - and by this I specifically mean barbers / hair salons or whatever they're called nowdays. I still feel guilty if I don't tip the women at my local barbers but at £12 I feel this is a fair enough amount to pay. Am I a tight-wad not to tip them or is tipping barbers now old-fashioned. The establishment in question is owned by the lady & so its her business & she sets the prices. I don't mind tipping waiters/waitresses as they are on minimal wages & any tip I leave is commensurate with the service I feel they've given. Same goes for any pizza / fast food deliveries but for someone who's business it is I just think its now outdated.
  • The 'tight fisted beer monkey' has to be one of the worst!

    You know the sort. Happily join in a round, but conveniently go 'MIA' when it's their shout!

    The shame of it! You know who you are!!

    {Roun.da.phobic} Someone who is never there when their round comes around

    They are usually very thick skinned too.

    We have an occasional one in our Friday drinking crew. On one particularly bad occasion one of my mates said to him -

    “I don’t know what it is that you’re saving up for, but it mustn’t half be fucking good?!?”

    ....he didn’t bat an eyelid.
  • Never had an issue with the round avoiders just as I never have and issue with the I got the last round in last time. if I want a drink I won't bother about whose round it is I'll just get one and ask anyone else if they want one.

    I almost drew the line when a well known poster on here wanted a Kir (white wine and creme de cassis).

    However, when a group come to settle a drinks bill at the end of the evening I absolutely hate the I only had this, he had a double, I only had one glass out of the bottle, I was on water brigade. You're out with a group of friends/colleagues just split the bill however many ways. I actually find it embarrassing.

    This has happened I n the last two years with our Christmas meal at work. I've just handed over my credit card and said pay me back whatever when I see you next. Needless the say, only the same few have given me a donation (one was a bottle of Rum, so well happy) and a thank you, but most haven't even bothered with the latter. I wouldn't normally mind but it was £372 this year.

    They probably think I claim it back on expenses - if only.
  • the only time i don't mind people not contributing is even recently went out for a meal with 2 other couples, one of them wasn't drinking and only had a main and a desert the rest of us had main starter and a couple of bottles of wine aswell as beers etc. so at the end of the meal we added hers up added service on top and then split the bill the other 5 of us.
  • Has no one ever used the phrase "It's your round, get them in"?

    And @addickted we were in France and I bought you and @Imissthepeanutman a Kir each as you'd never had one before. Should have known it would be wasted on you.

    PS who paid for the dodgems that night? Still makes me laugh.
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