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What is your idea of hell?

24

Comments

  • Films
    Anything with annoying wet blanket Adam Sandler. Plus points if it's got simpering "I always look like I'm about to sneeze" Keira Knightly in it. 

    Tv
    The X Factor, The Voice or any other talent show featuring the desperate and deluded.

    Music
    Abba

    Food 
    Chinese (gloopy, bland lethargy inducer)


    Drink
    Ouzo, Sambuca or any other aniseed flavoured booze. 

    Sport
    Rugby
    American Football (which is rugby but with sillier outfits and more ad breaks)

    Place
    Barnsley.
  • Films: Horror, only genre I dont have the balls to watch

    TV: Anything type of reality show, has made a mockery of the term celebrity of late!!

    Music: Rap!!!

    Food: Parsnips / Marmite

    Drinks: Red Wine!!!

    Place: Chatham, parking in the pentagon centre and the smell of piss is just disgusting!!
    What about going on a shopping date to Chatham with Gemma Collins, then back to hers to watch a horror film whilst snacking on some roasted parsnips and drinking red wine, then off to the bedroom where she puts on some rap music and asks you to smell her sweaty downstairs area?
    Some of us might put that on the "My Idea of Heaven" thread.
  • MrLargo said:
    Films: Horror, only genre I dont have the balls to watch

    TV: Anything type of reality show, has made a mockery of the term celebrity of late!!

    Music: Rap!!!

    Food: Parsnips / Marmite

    Drinks: Red Wine!!!

    Place: Chatham, parking in the pentagon centre and the smell of piss is just disgusting!!
    What about going on a shopping date to Chatham with Gemma Collins, then back to hers to watch a horror film whilst snacking on some roasted parsnips and drinking red wine, then off to the bedroom where she puts on some rap music and asks you to smell her sweaty downstairs area?
    Some of us might put that on the "My Idea of Heaven" thread.
    To be fair @cafcdave123 does tend to have no filter it seems
  • For legal reasons I can't say a Southeastern train.
  • edited August 2019
    For legal reasons I can't say a Southeastern train.
    What about a SsouthEeastern train?

    Or a SarfLondon one?
  • Films: Horror, only genre I dont have the balls to watch

    TV: Anything type of reality show, has made a mockery of the term celebrity of late!!

    Music: Rap!!!

    Food: Parsnips / Marmite

    Drinks: Red Wine!!!

    Place: Chatham, parking in the pentagon centre and the smell of piss is just disgusting!!
    What about going on a shopping date to Chatham with Gemma Collins, then back to hers to watch a horror film whilst snacking on some roasted parsnips and drinking red wine, then off to the bedroom where she puts on some rap music and asks you to smell her sweaty downstairs area?
    Close the thread - we have a winner. 
  • Having a flappy bit of skin next to the thumb nail and never being able to rip it off.
  • Films
    Fantasy/Superhero

    Tv
    Any Reality TV
    Portuguese TV until about 10PM 

    Music
    Autotuned pop , breathy twenty-something American girls, songs "written" by committee, anyone from any "talent" show.   

    Food 
    Jellied eels

    Drink
    Commercial ciders. Anything that (mostly) women claim is "...the only thing I drink", when it wasn't even in their vocabulary eighteen months ago.

    Sport
    Horse racing

    Place
    Albufeira in August  


    Overall. Finding I am one of only two men left on earth, and the other one insisting the destruction of the human race was down to the EU... 

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  • Kent being bowled out for under 40 against Essex.
  • Roland and Pardew in sexy underwear dancing provocatively in front of me with the Red Hot Chilli Peppers playing in the background and the Halifax choir advert playing on the TV. Outside thousands of people dressed in Crystal Palace full kits are counting down to New Years Day using hair brushes as pretend microphones as it rains sweetcorn and as it strikes12, an unabated 9 hours of Chas and Dave music is pumped through specially mounted speakers in Croydon.
  • Films:

    - No Reservations (a truly godawful "rom-com" that was neither rom nor com, starring Catherine Zeta Jones and Aaron Eckhart as chefs)
    - Most Adam Sandler films, exceptions being the Wedding Singer, Click, and maybe Happy Gilmore

    TV:

    - Anything like Geordie or Jersey Shore, Made in Chelsea, TOWIE, all that rubbish

    Music:

    - ... not very much, really. Maybe Kenny G and the like.

    Food:

    - Coriander (can't taste it due to genetic misfortune)

    Drink:

    - Dogh. It's grim.

    Sport:

    - Don't think I could ever get into hockey/ice hockey.

    Place:

    - Selhurst Park!
  • A Frankie and Bennies restaurant playing Adele over and over on loop

    With Bobby Sands on toilet duty and Hitler front of house, Abu Hamza head waiter and only their truly disgusting macaroni cheese being served 
  • Studio 338 have just taken over Sugar Hut, I think you'd struggle to find a worse place on earth than that.
  • Croydon said:
    Studio 338 have just taken over Sugar Hut, I think you'd struggle to find a worse place on earth than that.
    Top crumpet though
  • Woodstock - all the 50 year celebrations dodge the main issue of being stuck in a quagmire with 300,000 hippies, one bog per 800 people and no doubt a sound system that was awful, that is when the performers weren't getting electrocuted.
  • Working in any kind of shop between Oct & Jan when Christmas Carols are played on a loop.  5 years of working in the Welling co-op while doing A-Levels & Degree brought years of punishment.

    Ex-wife winning the lottery.

    Not seeing my kids, got a few friends in that situation right now and its unbearable for them.

    The obvious losing to Arsenal and them winning anything...

    Everything else is reasonably bearable.


  • Glastonbury. Having to go camping, far too many people, not enough sleep, drowning in mud or absolutely baking. Would far rather watch it on the telly.
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  • Watching duel screens of Man U under Fergie score in the 95th minute and The English patient, while trapped inside a polystyrene room (while some evil bastard rubs the wall) listening to Celine Dions greatest hits while being forced fed the fat off of ham.
     Sorry I couldn’t be more specific 

  • Woodstock - all the 50 year celebrations dodge the main issue of being stuck in a quagmire with 300,000 hippies, one bog per 800 people and no doubt a sound system that was awful, that is when the performers weren't getting electrocuted.
    No matter just wish I could have been there !
  • Charlton in league 1, nigels in the Prem.
  • Having a sudden dose of the trots and stuck on a flight for hours.
  • Films
    Sentimental American comedies 

    Tv
    Most reality - Strictly is ok as it requires work and talent

    Music
    Rap

    Food 
    Pretentious


    Drink
    Coconut water

    Sport
    Horse racing

    Place
    Crystal Palace
  • abattoirs
    vivisection laboratories
    being in the Den with the scum winning
    any tory government - especially this one!
    Trump as President
    Charlton losing and Millwall & Palarse winning
    being stuck in the middle of the Med in a rubber dinghy
    my shitty neighbours when they have their loud all night parties
    having no job, no money and stuck in a council flat in somewhere like Jarrow
  • Films - Any Fast and Furious

    TV - Any reality show (maybe except I’m a celebrity)

    Music - Genesis

    Food - Cheese

    Drink - Tomato juice

    Sport - Horse racing

    Place - Anywhere I’m not with my family (and West Bromwich)
  • Films
    Most things with Tom Hanks

    Tv
    Any reality TV but particularly Love Island.  Also Mrs Browns Boys.

    Music
    Death metal

    Food 
    Trout

    Drink
    Jagerbomb or Vodka Redbull

    Sport
    American Football

    Place
    Lloret de Marr
  • Bus stations, full of lost luggage and lost souls. 
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Roland Out Forever!