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At least he didn't have to explain it.AddicksAddict said:
Very good, but it’s poor form laughing at your own joke.iainment said:
Wor drums? 😂AddicksAddict said:
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What is the space between the front door and the back door of a Nando's called?
The Peri-Perineum9 -
Last night my wife and I watched the extended edition of the Lord of the Rings trilogy back to back. Luckily I was the one facing the TV.10
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I just got this birthday card from my brother. As he’s a Millwall supporter,
I just got this birthday card from my brother. As he’s a Millwall supporter, I’m surprised he didn’t cross out England and write Charlton. 1 -
because he knows we will NEVER have 13 shots!AddicksAddict said:I just got this birthday card from my brother. As he’s a male supporter,
I just got this birthday card from my brother. As he’s a Millwall supporter, I’m surprised he didn’t cross out England and write Charlton.2 -

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From Facebook.13 -
This week's cover of Private Eye .. The Donald is sitting in the Oval office, white MAGA hat, open collar shirt, blue suit, looking half asleep
Seated either side are two of his acolytes
One says to the other 'is the supreme leader dead' ?
'No', replies the other .. 'Trump always looks like this' .. boom boom lol
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The cartoon from this week's books section in the Guardian. The cartoonist has shared it on social media.

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Lincsaddick said:This week's cover of Private Eye .. The Donald is sitting in the Oval office, white MAGA hat, open collar shirt, blue suit, looking half asleep
Seated either side are two of his acolytes
One says to the other 'is the supreme leader dead' ?
'No', replies the other .. 'Trump always looks like this' .. boom boom lol
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I hate people who take drugs……
like custom officers and police!7 -
A beer was thrown at President Trump during a press conference this afternoon in Washington.
Trump was unharmed. Since the beer was a draft, he was able to dodge it.
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What musical instrument did King Alfred play?The Anglo-Saxophone.2
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That is clever and dreadful in equal measure.jose said:What musical instrument did King Alfred play?The Anglo-Saxophone.1 -

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What’s the difference between Iran and Vietnam?Trump had a plan for getting out of Vietnam.11
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Old Tommy Cooper joke.....
A duck goes into a Chemist's shop and buys some Lipsil.
He says "can you put that on my bill please"6 -
Bob and Carol (two humans) meet Zog and Zag, two Martians, at a hotel bar and enjoy each other's company. At the end of the evening, Zog and Zag reveal that they are into swinging. Bob and Carol say that they are, too. It is quickly agreed that Bob goes off with the Martian woman, Zag, and Carol goes off with the Martian man, Zog. When Zog gets into bed with Carol, he asks Carol how big she would like him to be. Carol looks surprised. "Look, just twist my ear, and it will be an inch bigger", he tells Carol. Carol twists his ear and is surprised to find he is indeed an inch bigger. "You can twist it again if you want another inch and twist it as many times as you like", says Zog. Carol soon understands how it works and twists Zog's ear a few more times. They have a marvellously satisfying night. At breakfast the next morning, Carol thinks she ought to have a private breakfast with Bob to make sure he was OK, too, as they had never swapped with a Martian couple before. As Bob is buttering his toast, he asks Carol, "How was your night, then?" "Oh, fabulous", replies Carol. "What about you, Bob?" she asks. "Terrible", he replies, "Zag spent the whole night fiddling with my ears".2
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You know you're spending too much time online if you understand this joke.

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Sponsored links:
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Spiders have 8 eyes, which means they should actually be called spiiiiiiiiiders.5
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Our mismanagement of the environment has crossed the point of no return, the dolphins are leaving
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In the words of Douglas Adams, "So long, and thanks for all the fish".AddicksAddict said:
Our mismanagement of the environment has crossed the point of no return, the dolphins are leaving1 -
Totally lost. I've looked up who Leroy Jenkins is and that hasn't helped.Swindon_Addick said:You know you're spending too much time online if you understand this joke.
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You need to see the original you tube video of leroy jenkins, showing game play from world of warcraft from the noughties, to get this.
Leroy was a player who ignored a carefully constructed plan by his team mates and got all the team killed by being reckless.
The plane is reckless flying across Iran given the war in progress. Thats the connection.
And yes I spend too long online!2 -

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Krypton = Kr
Potassium = K0









