Mate got pinched in Ibiza for a bit of drunken singing in the street/general laddish behaviour this summer, him and a couple of his mates who tried to defend him got absolutely smashed the hell out of with batons, he was hospitalised for 4 days, he's not much in frame, they really went to town on him - absolute animals the foreign OB.
nope got out of tenerife with the rozzas looking for me thank god for Darren and claire the 1st choice reps (eternally grateful for your people smuggling skills), the half hr delay whilst on the plane was the most cacking it i had ever been,
mix up with the complementory room resulting in a big old security guard coming in forcing his way into the bathroom where my missus was showering and me returning seconds later to her screams and him trying to remove her from the bathroom.
it wasnt pretty, it hurt me and him lots and he was quick with his large stick however once i got it off him i was quicker had to get changed in the hall way with him locked in the room and me and the missus running with suitcases down veronicas and behind the crazy golf until we met the reps who fortunatly had a friend in our hotel that had witnessed it all and they took pity on us and helped us right out.
but a jail stretch was well on the cards for that moment of agression
I have a golden rule which is never, ever get pinched in a country that doesn't even use the alphabet. If they just use a squiggle then you ain't coming home!
Not me...
But a few years ago a couple of friends were touring around East Europe before the end of the Warsaw Pact, mostly because it was cheaper than Western Europe. Somehow they found themselves in Yugoslavia, this was the era not long after Tito had croaked, but before it disintegrated into civil war. One morning they were waiting for a bus, it was hot, the bus was late and they had nothing to do. Seeing a statue in the town square they decided to climb it, drape a scarf over it, take a few photos etc. Big mistake, before they knew what had happened a crowd had gathered and were demanding blood. The police arrived in time to save their skin and promptly arrested them for desecrating a war memorial. The local plod gave them a choice - either pay a large fine or spend the night in prison ahead of a court appearence which they assured then would result in jail time. Naturally they paid the bribe...
No. A couple of close calls though: 1.Away at Coventry for singing when we were all told to shut up 2. For kissing openly in the street in Indonesia (even though it was 3am someone grassed us up!) 3. I also paid a bribe in Indonesia to get off a crime I hadn't done
So, give or take the odd one or two, I make that 47 who've felt the long arm of the law grab them by the scruff of the neck and 37 who are either lying or else have led very sheltered (and lucky!) lives.
More shocking than that though is the fact that one of my topics somehow made it to 134 posts!!!
[cite]Posted By: Off_it[/cite]So, give or take the odd one or two, I make that 47 who've felt the long arm of the law grab them by the scruff of the neck and 37 who are either lying or else have led very sheltered (and lucky!) lives.
More shocking than that though is the fact that one of my topics somehow made it to 134 posts!!!
I would dispute the lying and/or sheltered part although will accept the lucky.
when i was 15, drunk as f**kl got off train in Sidcup didnt know where the hell i was , and fell asleep on bench on the station. About midnight was woken up by 2 coppers who arrested my for trespass on the railway ???? so i was at sidcup nick standing before the desk sarg he is giving me this huge lecture about the demon drink and my age. I tell him i feel ill can i please go to the toilet ? no he says and carrys on with the sermon. i again say i dont feel to good need the toilet -- but as OB do everywhere they dont listen do they ? so he carrys on and 2 mins latter gets about 5 pints of Courage Best all over him and the charge book !!! i tell you i think the director from the exorsist was in there----- projectile vomit. The Sarg stands there driping and the two that nicked me fall about laughing !!!! so he says" ^&*%£("!&* out of here". They two who had first nicked me even gave me a lift home and they thought it was the best laugh they had had for years. Me i was spotless.
When 19 and on a mates holiday I had an all day and night session and was completely wasted and passed out. One of my mates carried me around from pub to pub (an ice breaker with the ladies aparently) and at the end of the night they decided to stop for a Kebab so my mate put me down in the middle of the road (not the pavement - the road) before wandering into the kebab shop.
When the came out two spanish policemen had hold of my arms and legs about to throw me into the back of their wagon when my mates came back to claim me and they let me go - a close one.
I woke up covered in Sangria which had aparently been poured over me to try to revive me.
Believe it or not whilst on a venture scouts treking holiday in the Austrian Tyrol.
We ended up in a place called Solden. Masses of very cheap beer (Natru Brau I think it was called - sediment in the bottom and everything).
4 Crates between 10-12 of us, a smashed up TV room on the campsite, a TV launched at a German camper, huge punch up with the said campers mates, numerous tents flattened......thought we were the proverbial conquering army until the Austrian OB turned up and pulled guns on us. Never shit myself so much in my life....
Deported from Austria, word got back to Scout Master HQ and upon our arrival back in England we were promptly de-woggled. Actually had the deportation papers framed and on my bedroom wall for a year or so.
Grown up a bit since then (allegedly). Looking back it is quite funny.
and Mr. Snide you should have been arrested for invading the pitch up at Filbert Street
Not to mention chasing those Scouse scallywags over a cemetry wall on the outskirts of Liverpool...was that the trip where Razil's old banger fell apart on the M1 and he completed the trip with his car held together with computer leads & sellotape?
Hmmm you didn't do so badly at Villa Park in 1998. Smashing glasses in the pub before hand whilst Russian dancing, spotted by a client on match of the day - in the crucifix position standing on your seat. Not to mention punching Jeff in the face when he turned round to celebrate Mills' goal!!!!!. Didn't the bouncers in that pub shut the doors and let us get on with it? I also recall and absolute nutter from Wales telling us how he supported Charlton because they played at the Valley.
Got away with the Filbert St episode as I was the worst pitch invader ever. Super Clive scores, I erupt in a booze fuelled frenzy and find myself running up the cinder track towards the home end.....thankfully I had a swift reallity check and jumped back into the away end before the stewards could nab me. I've never seen Prior laugh so much.
Couldn't possibly comment about alleged pursuits up the North Lancs Rd........but yes it was the day Razil drove with a computer lead holding his exhaust on....that was after he had got 35 miles north of Watford and realised he had left his ticket at home LMFAO!!!!! I can still see Daly's face as they turned round at the services.
Razil assuring everyone that the "funkmeister" (to the unlearned we mean a 10 year old XR3 with moss growing on the rear passenger windows) would get him home and back for kick-off. Almost unbelievably it did.
I still recall almost having an epileptic fit once in Razil's "Funkmeister" as he tore down the A13 triggering every speed camera in both directions....
Comments
mix up with the complementory room resulting in a big old security guard coming in forcing his way into the bathroom where my missus was showering and me returning seconds later to her screams and him trying to remove her from the bathroom.
it wasnt pretty, it hurt me and him lots and he was quick with his large stick however once i got it off him i was quicker had to get changed in the hall way with him locked in the room and me and the missus running with suitcases down veronicas and behind the crazy golf until we met the reps who fortunatly had a friend in our hotel that had witnessed it all and they took pity on us and helped us right out.
but a jail stretch was well on the cards for that moment of agression
Not me...
But a few years ago a couple of friends were touring around East Europe before the end of the Warsaw Pact, mostly because it was cheaper than Western Europe. Somehow they found themselves in Yugoslavia, this was the era not long after Tito had croaked, but before it disintegrated into civil war. One morning they were waiting for a bus, it was hot, the bus was late and they had nothing to do. Seeing a statue in the town square they decided to climb it, drape a scarf over it, take a few photos etc. Big mistake, before they knew what had happened a crowd had gathered and were demanding blood. The police arrived in time to save their skin and promptly arrested them for desecrating a war memorial. The local plod gave them a choice - either pay a large fine or spend the night in prison ahead of a court appearence which they assured then would result in jail time. Naturally they paid the bribe...
Yes most know when
1.Away at Coventry for singing when we were all told to shut up
2. For kissing openly in the street in Indonesia (even though it was 3am someone grassed us up!)
3. I also paid a bribe in Indonesia to get off a crime I hadn't done
More shocking than that though is the fact that one of my topics somehow made it to 134 posts!!!
I would dispute the lying and/or sheltered part although will accept the lucky.
Knowing how to hold your beer helps : - )
Believe me mate, you haven't grown up!!
When the came out two spanish policemen had hold of my arms and legs about to throw me into the back of their wagon when my mates came back to claim me and they let me go - a close one.
I woke up covered in Sangria which had aparently been poured over me to try to revive me.
Believe it or not whilst on a venture scouts treking holiday in the Austrian Tyrol.
We ended up in a place called Solden. Masses of very cheap beer (Natru Brau I think it was called - sediment in the bottom and everything).
4 Crates between 10-12 of us, a smashed up TV room on the campsite, a TV launched at a German camper, huge punch up with the said campers mates, numerous tents flattened......thought we were the proverbial conquering army until the Austrian OB turned up and pulled guns on us. Never shit myself so much in my life....
Deported from Austria, word got back to Scout Master HQ and upon our arrival back in England we were promptly de-woggled. Actually had the deportation papers framed and on my bedroom wall for a year or so.
Grown up a bit since then (allegedly). Looking back it is quite funny.
Ho hum the excess of youth and all that.
Not to mention chasing those Scouse scallywags over a cemetry wall on the outskirts of Liverpool...was that the trip where Razil's old banger fell apart on the M1 and he completed the trip with his car held together with computer leads & sellotape?
Got away with the Filbert St episode as I was the worst pitch invader ever. Super Clive scores, I erupt in a booze fuelled frenzy and find myself running up the cinder track towards the home end.....thankfully I had a swift reallity check and jumped back into the away end before the stewards could nab me. I've never seen Prior laugh so much.
Couldn't possibly comment about alleged pursuits up the North Lancs Rd........but yes it was the day Razil drove with a computer lead holding his exhaust on....that was after he had got 35 miles north of Watford and realised he had left his ticket at home LMFAO!!!!! I can still see Daly's face as they turned round at the services.
Razil assuring everyone that the "funkmeister" (to the unlearned we mean a 10 year old XR3 with moss growing on the rear passenger windows) would get him home and back for kick-off. Almost unbelievably it did.