Toilet Roll

AidenTheAddick

Scrunch or fold?

I was horrified to discover that some people scrunch. I assumed EVERYONE folded.

You won't get many more important topics than this on here, so you're welcome.

cafcfan

We need a survey.
BTW, the USA, why does the country that has the largest arses in the world have the smallest sheets of bog paper?
Fold.

guinnessaddick

Just throw the rolls from the north upper.

ShootersHillGuru

I don't understand the question

oohaahmortimer

Andrex the purple pack is my toilet paper of choice .... Fold but I wipe my arse sitting down back to front not fit enough to stand up and wipe
How do you wipe ?

ShootersHillGuru

Stand up !!!!!!!!!!!
I'm out of this now.

ValleyGary

I fold to wipe.

I never realised people sat down to wipe, I always stood up. But then someone told me they sat to wipe a few years back and I havent looked back since. Makes so much more sense.

AidenTheAddick

I didn't even think of sit down or stand up... Siddarn!

Baldybonce

oohaahmortimer said:

Andrex the purple pack is my toilet paper of choice .... Fold but I wipe my arse sitting down back to front not fit enough to stand up and wipe
How do you wipe ?

using my origami skills I like to make a replica of the flying Scotsman and wipe engine first.

ForeverAddickted

Stand up and scrunch

Baldybonce

Does anyone remember the toilet paper that was like greaseproof paper? usually to be found in public toilets. Horrible stuff.

MrOneLung

remain seated.
Scrunch.
Lift balls.
Wipe.

ads

Baldybonce said:

oohaahmortimer said:

Andrex the purple pack is my toilet paper of choice .... Fold but I wipe my arse sitting down back to front not fit enough to stand up and wipe
How do you wipe ?

using my origami skills I like to make a replica of the flying Scotsman and wipe engine first.

Train inspired arse wiping

Baldybonce

ads said:

Baldybonce said:

oohaahmortimer said:

Andrex the purple pack is my toilet paper of choice .... Fold but I wipe my arse sitting down back to front not fit enough to stand up and wipe
How do you wipe ?

using my origami skills I like to make a replica of the flying Scotsman and wipe engine first.

Train inspired arse wiping

Real Charlton.

charltonkeston

Baldybonce said:

Does anyone remember the toilet paper that was like greaseproof paper? usually to be found in public toilets. Horrible stuff.

Izal. Incredible stuff.

seth plum

Tsk. Toilet paper?
Everybody knows a sheet of moist moss lifted from a rock is best, and also has astringent qualities.
Andrex is for wimps, and people who don't live in the Scottish highlands.

ShootersHillGuru

seth plum said:

Tsk. Toilet paper?
Everybody knows a sheet of moist moss lifted from a rock is best, and also has astringent qualities.
Andrex is for wimps, and people who don't live in the Scottish highlands.

Moss !!!!!!!! I use a thistle

Baldybonce

charltonkeston said:

Baldybonce said:

Does anyone remember the toilet paper that was like greaseproof paper? usually to be found in public toilets. Horrible stuff.

Izal. Incredible stuff.

you couldn't scrunch that, more of an extra smooth glide.

Baldybonce

seth plum said:

Tsk. Toilet paper?
Everybody knows a sheet of moist moss lifted from a rock is best, and also has astringent qualities.
Andrex is for wimps, and people who don't live in the Scottish highlands.

do you wipe with one hand whilst slapping midges with the other?

SantaClaus

My 4 and 5 year olds have worked out that wiping your ass is for mugs. It's much better to scream 'no more poo daddy' and dare me to ignore them.

ilovelucy

No toilet paper. Squat over an outside "humanure" hole, (dig, fill, dig new hole, gradually creating richer growing soil). Shower off, dry off. Sorted au naturelle! Very pleasant, plus minimal carbon footprint, or even zero c.f. via nature's shower, if it's raining out!

Baldybonce

ilovelucy said:

No toilet paper. Squat over an outside "humanure" hole, (dig, fill, dig new hole, gradually creating richer growing soil). Shower off, dry off. Sorted au naturelle! Very pleasant, plus minimal carbon footprint, or even zero c.f. via nature's shower, if it's raining out!

and when you're shopping in Eltham?

brogib

Folded wet wipes

Addickted2TheReds

Stand, fold, wipe.

Any other way is completely wrong.

ShootersHillGuru

Standing just seems both mechanically and morally wrong.

ilovelucy

Baldybonce said:

ilovelucy said:

No toilet paper. Squat over an outside "humanure" hole, (dig, fill, dig new hole, gradually creating richer growing soil). Shower off, dry off. Sorted au naturelle! Very pleasant, plus minimal carbon footprint, or even zero c.f. via nature's shower, if it's raining out!

and when you're shopping in Eltham?

Best leave that one alone, the answer will seem even more odd than the post. However, some evolved countries have arse showers in the public cubicles, and some posher venues even incorporate an undercarriage dryer in the set-up!

Halix

What a crap subject.

My personal attendant sorts mine.

purdis

Roll on the new season

golfaddick

brogib said:

Folded wet wipes

the bane of all sewerman & the reason why we are getting more & more blocked drains nowdays.

Also, why pay extra for quality bog paper ? It all does the same thing & all gets flushed away.Not saying you should use the greaseproof paper stuff as mentioned above, but a supermarkets basic range is just as good as Andrex.

T_C_E

Izal,
When men were men and when the box was empty you'd the edge of the Karzy door!!

brogib

golfaddick said:

brogib said:

Folded wet wipes

the bane of all sewerman & the reason why we are getting more & more blocked drains nowdays.

Also, why pay extra for quality bog paper ? It all does the same thing & all gets flushed away.Not saying you should use the greaseproof paper stuff as mentioned above, but a supermarkets basic range is just as good as Andrex.

We got a septic tank, so all out wipes go in a bin.