Attention: Please take a moment to consider our terms and conditions before posting.

Toilet Roll

13

Comments

  • There is nothing like the panic the onset of a watery shit gives you if you are away from your house.
  • Yeah don't ever go to Greece or Mexico

    All the boys holidays I went on to Greek shit hole islands the paper bin was full by the first morning. And it always lands marmite side up.

    We asked this moody old Greek sod to empty it or give us another one. He refused so we took to burning the paper. He relented and changed it everyday
  • MrOneLung said:

    There is nothing like the panic the onset of a watery shit gives you if you are away from your house.

    Cold sweats the lot. Bloody horrible feeling that.

    It's also when he creative side of humanity comes out.
  • edited May 2015
    MrOneLung said:

    remain seated.
    Scrunch.
    Lift balls.
    Wipe.

    Surprised a Charlton supporter would employ such underhanded tactics.
  • It depends on how much time I have. If there are others waiting to use to loo or I'm in a rush it's scrunch, wipe, down repeat. If it's a nice casual poo then wind, wipe, fold, wipe, down, repeat.
  • I thought women didn't poo?
  • This site just keeps on giving....:-)
  • I thought women didn't poo?

    Yeah, me too. Thought they were made of sugar & spice & all things nice?
  • Don't know why we're even discussing this.
    Toilet paper is so old fashioned - and solutions to winnit and dangleberry problems have been around for ages:
  • Surprised Henry hasn't been extolling the virtues and delights of his bidet.
  • Sponsored links:


  • Why don't loo rolls get thrown these days onto the pitch when someone scores? Was all the rage on the 70's
  • Why don't loo rolls get thrown these days onto the pitch when someone scores? Was all the rage on the 70's

    Coz you'd get 4 years in clink
  • Just had a dump in a pub and made the cardinal sin of not checking for paper, had to phone a mate to get me some who found it highly amusing before actually asking for some
  • smiffyboy said:

    Just had a dump in a pub and made the cardinal sin of not checking for paper, had to phone a mate to get me some who found it highly amusing before actually asking for some

    Sacrificial pants
  • Unbelievable thread.
  • Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
  • Luckily I didn't have to use the pants
  • brogib said:

    Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
    Well if I hadn't opened it I wouldn't have known it was an unbelievable thread!
  • brogib said:

    Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
    Well if I hadn't opened it I wouldn't have known it was an unbelievable thread!
    Which do you find unbelievable; scrunch or fold? Or stand or sit?
  • brogib said:

    Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
    Well if I hadn't opened it I wouldn't have known it was an unbelievable thread!
    Which do you find unbelievable; scrunch or fold? Or stand or sit?
    Or that nobody on CL seems to have a 'Clag-Gone' installed in their khazi.
  • Sponsored links:


  • Why isn't the cardboard tube of a toilet roll made of something that's easily dissolvable ?
  • brogib said:

    Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
    Well if I hadn't opened it I wouldn't have known it was an unbelievable thread!
    Smilie face Beds ffs
  • smiffyboy said:

    Just had a dump in a pub and made the cardinal sin of not checking for paper, had to phone a mate to get me some who found it highly amusing before actually asking for some

    Surely you always have a safety wipe of the seat before perching down which would alert you to this issue!!!

  • brogib said:

    brogib said:

    Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
    Well if I hadn't opened it I wouldn't have known it was an unbelievable thread!
    Smilie face Beds ffs


    image
  • Tried the sit-down technique today... those of you who do that are all f'ing savages.

    It was a similar experience to those bikes at theme parks where the handlebars and the front wheel are aligned so that the front wheel does the opposite to what you tell it to do. It's dysfunctional and you're all wrong'uns.

    Wrong, wrong, wrong.

    Sit downers = Palace fans.
    Scrunchers = Millwall fans.
  • brogib said:

    brogib said:

    Unbelievable thread.

    Yet you decided to open it and leave a comment

    : )
    Well if I hadn't opened it I wouldn't have known it was an unbelievable thread!
    Smilie face Beds ffs


    image
    Think you've found oohaahs new avatar
  • Tried the sit-down technique today... those of you who do that are all f'ing savages.

    It was a similar experience to those bikes at theme parks where the handlebars and the front wheel are aligned so that the front wheel does the opposite to what you tell it to do. It's dysfunctional and you're all wrong'uns.

    Wrong, wrong, wrong.

    Sit downers = Palace fans.
    Scrunchers = Millwall fans.

    Confused, don't everybody sit down whilst pooing/wiping? It makes physical sense too as when you're sitting your cheeks are looser and parting, if you're standing you'll have to pull them apart whilst trying to wipe, surely that is more savage?
  • It's a thread of the lowest humour but a great thread
  • Er....three pages of talking sh*t.....? Got to love the openness and seriousness on CL when it comes to random issues! :)
  • Er....three pages of talking sh*t.....? Got to love the openness and seriousness on CL when it comes to random issues! :)

    Welcome back Jessie, where have you been for so long...............the toilet?
Sign In or Register to comment.

Roland Out Forever!