Tom, hold your head up and take pride knowing that you've already achieved more in your life than all of these idiots combined will even dream of doing. You have a bright future ahead of you and a great work ethic to strive towards your life goals. You are a better person than any of these can even dream of becoming
Utter filth and shitty scum of society - seriously words fail me how anyone can do this. I actually worry what would have happened had I been on that bus - I think I would have lost my temper and got myself into trouble.
I just can’t fathom the fact people just ignored it.
Utter filth and shitty scum of society - seriously words fail me how anyone can do this. I actually worry what would have happened had I been on that bus - I think I would have lost my temper and got myself into trouble.
I just can’t fathom the fact people just ignored it.
I can undertsand being worried that they might have a knife. 6 of them and one of me. However, I think I'd have got off at the same stop and followed at a safe distance phoning the police.
As a parent of a disabled child I am not shocked. It is horrible but this new generation think anything is ok and that nothing is off limits. Tom I salute you.
Some good advice I read and am posting in case anybody ever needs to use it is to go and chat with the victim if you ever see somebody being verbally abused e.g. on public transport.
Just ignore the abusers and go have a chat with the abused. This avoids confrontation and gets the job done in terms of helping and reassuring the abused.
Some good advice I read and am posting in case anybody ever needs to use it is to go and chat with the victim if you ever see somebody being verbally abused e.g. on public transport.
Just ignore the abusers and go have a chat with the abused. This avoids confrontation and gets the job done in terms of helping and reassuring the abused.
This goes for racism, disablism, homophobia...
Sorry @Siv_in_Norfolk but you're just offering yourself up as someone else to be abused. If you do decide to intervene on public transport be loud, assertive and hope others then join in. If there are not many people around think about your actions as these shitbags are just dying for the excuse to escalate with you being thier target.
And I should add. Getting your phone out and filming might not be a good idea if you're spotted. Put it on record in your pocket.
Some good advice I read and am posting in case anybody ever needs to use it is to go and chat with the victim if you ever see somebody being verbally abused e.g. on public transport.
Just ignore the abusers and go have a chat with the abused. This avoids confrontation and gets the job done in terms of helping and reassuring the abused.
This goes for racism, disablism, homophobia...
Really good advice. I remember giving it billy big bollocks here years ago when people were complaining about racism at football and asking why they didn't challenge it. Being older and hopefully more mature I understand that it's not that straight forward.
Whilst I would like to think I would try and step in im not so cocksure as I was when younger because there are so many incidents of the scum that walks among us stabbing those who intervene etc so the above is really excellent advice.
As for the pondlife who are responsible for this then they will eventually meet bigger and scummier pondlife in their tragic little existences and get what they are due.
Don't let scum like this get you down Tom, focus on the positive messages on this thread and well wishes from the Charlton family.
Some good advice I read and am posting in case anybody ever needs to use it is to go and chat with the victim if you ever see somebody being verbally abused e.g. on public transport.
Just ignore the abusers and go have a chat with the abused. This avoids confrontation and gets the job done in terms of helping and reassuring the abused.
This goes for racism, disablism, homophobia...
Really good advice. I remember giving it billy big bollocks here years ago when people were complaining about racism at football and asking why they didn't challenge it. Being older and hopefully more mature I understand that it's not that straight forward.
Whilst I would like to think I would try and step in im not so cocksure as I was when younger because there are so many incidents of the scum that walks among us stabbing those who intervene etc so the above is really excellent advice.
As for the pondlife who are responsible for this then they will eventually meet bigger and scummier pondlife in their tragic little existences and get what they are due.
Don't let scum like this get you down Tom, focus on the positive messages on this thread and well wishes from the Charlton family.
I agree. Let’s be honest, until someone is actually in that situation you wouldn’t have a clue what you’d do. You can’t criticise anyone on the bus, one person stands up and the other passengers shit themselves, you could find yourself in a whole world of trouble. Some 14 year old kids in SE London don’t give a shit for anyone.
Sometimes you have to stop being a passive bystander even if it is high risk. I like the idea about inserting yourself between the abusers and abused and ignoring the abusers whilst comforting the victim.
I think on impulse I probably would get involved, but I don't necessarily think that's the best idea. Taking down as many details as you can is probably the best way to go and maybe covertly film what's going on.
There's an American program called What Would You Do, where they get actors to act out scenarios involving prejudices of one form or other, and see how members of the public react. Get it up on YouTube, they're quite interesting
Sometimes you have to stop being a passive bystander even if it is high risk. I like the idea about inserting yourself between the abusers and abused and ignoring the abusers whilst comforting the victim.
Have done so a number of times over the years. Did it before at a boxing night years ago to some knuckledragger and fortunately he piped down. Would I do it so readily now and risked getting "shanked" for "disresepecting" some lowlife inadequate on a bus nowdays and risk leaving my kids fatherless...probably not.
Too many stories of people intervening and getting head kicked in/ stabbed/ killed by the feral wannabe gangsters and so commonplace that it barely makes the front pages these days that it certainly does or should make you think twice.
Yes ideally we should step in and stand up and I always used to berate others for not doing so and was very confident that I would but couldn't honestly say I always and immediately would these days. Too much at risk.
There's ways to deal with it after the event without directly intervening at the time which may not always deescalate the situation but would actually even escalate things.
If one doesn’t take action the victim gets it worse whilst you simply witness it. Maybe it is because I am old and don’t give a shit. An heroic death isn’t the worse way to go.
If one doesn’t take action the victim gets it worse whilst you simply witness it. Maybe it is because I am old and don’t give a shit. An heroic death isn’t the worse way to go.
Tell that to the bloke I worked with, who bled out in a car park in front of his family, after standing up to 14 years olds
Sometimes you have to stop being a passive bystander even if it is high risk. I like the idea about inserting yourself between the abusers and abused and ignoring the abusers whilst comforting the victim.
That's all it is though, an idea.
In the real world if you had gone and sat with the victim then you would have simply ended up as the target yourself.
Realistically the only thing that would stop scum like this is if a bigger, older group intervened. As Gary said, kids don't give a fuck these days.
That's the whole point though isnt it. We all think kids dont give a fuck but why is that ? My own thoughts are that they know that nothing will happen as a consequence of their actions. Can u imagine kids 20 years ago even contemplating behaving like this in public ? There is a lack of morality in so many of this generation that they could even remotely think shit like this is acceptable
In the scenario that happened to Tom I'd find it hard not to intervene but accept it may not be a wise thing to do. As the father of disabled kids I'd be horrified to witness it and the red mist would descend - I don't think I could just watch it happen.
If one doesn’t take action the victim gets it worse whilst you simply witness it. Maybe it is because I am old and don’t give a shit. An heroic death isn’t the worse way to go.
Tell that to the bloke I worked with, who bled out in a car park in front of his family, after standing up to 14 years olds
I think you said the man was trying to protect his daughter. Am I right? In that instance did he have any choice but to step in, it is appalling he died in such a way, even though he was heroic…but it was his daughter! Blame, if that is an appropriate term, is with the murderers, not the protective dad.
Sometimes you have to stop being a passive bystander even if it is high risk. I like the idea about inserting yourself between the abusers and abused and ignoring the abusers whilst comforting the victim.
That's all it is though, an idea.
In the real world if you had gone and sat with the victim then you would have simply ended up as the target yourself.
Realistically the only thing that would stop scum like this is if a bigger, older group intervened. As Gary said, kids don't give a fuck these days.
Surely if a person takes action it stops being an idea but becomes a reality.
with the CCTV footage, it shouldn't take too long to track down these brave lads .. thing is, IF they are prosecuted instead of given a 'caution', what silly sentence will they get ?
with the CCTV footage, it shouldn't take too long to track down these brave lads .. thing is, IF they are prosecuted instead of given a 'caution', what silly sentence will they get ?
with the CCTV footage, it shouldn't take too long to track down these brave lads .. thing is, IF they are prosecuted instead of given a 'caution', what silly sentence will they get ?
Join Katie Price at the Priory?
excuse the humour .. but having to put up with her for a week would be akin to cruel and unjust punishment
If one doesn’t take action the victim gets it worse whilst you simply witness it. Maybe it is because I am old and don’t give a shit. An heroic death isn’t the worse way to go.
Tell that to the bloke I worked with, who bled out in a car park in front of his family, after standing up to 14 years olds
I think you said the man was trying to protect his daughter. Am I right? In that instance did he have any choice but to step in, it is appalling he died in such a way, even though he was heroic…but it was his daughter! Blame, if that is an appropriate term, is with the murderers, not the protective dad.
The post was more in response to "An heroic death isn’t the worse way to go", but whether it's a complete stranger you're stepping in for, or your daughter, I'd wouldn't expect when the worst case scenario happens, going out as a hero is at the top of the hero-come-victim's mind, and they'd be thinking the same - "why didn't I just keep my mouth shut to live another day".
In saying that, it reminds me of a situation I found myself in over North Woolwich when I lived there. My then partner's daughter was dating a lad who was from another part of East London and, unbeknownst to us, he'd been having this ongoing tit for tat battle with some of the local boys whenever he visited on his scooter. I won't go into what he done leading up to this, but it ended up with 4 car loads outside my partners front door, armed with baseball bats and dog chains (possible knives tucked away aswell) wanting him outside. Tbh he was very apologetic to us and was game enough to go out and have it out with them, which left me stood in the front yard / doorway between them. It all happened so quickly and all I could think was, don't show them any fear. This went on for what seemed like a lifetime, until you could hear police sirens in the distance and they went. (Tbh - that was just the start of it) the only way I could guarantee we didn't need to sleep with one eye open every night was to walk into a packed pub by myself, owned by a couple of the lads dad and promise him the boyfriend wouldn't be welcomed round my partners house ever again.
When it's family or friends, I think this kind of thing happens organically, but with strangers, even a split second could possibly be enough to make the decision to not get involved in the same way
Sorry but I would always intervene. Its the way I was brought up. Doubt that will ever change all the while I have a tongue in my head.
I really don’t understand how one could not.
I see Tom is at the Womens game today. Some great photos coming out. The lad should be applauded from on high for not letting these pond life drag him down 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Sorry but I would always intervene. Its the way I was brought up. Doubt that will ever change all the while I have a tongue in my head.
I really don’t understand how one could not.
I see Tom is at the Womens game today. Some great photos coming out. The lad should be applauded from on high for not letting these pond life drag him down 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
It's different for women than men.
(As in violent, physical confrontation will likely arise far easier).
That's the whole point though isnt it. We all think kids dont give a fuck but why is that ? My own thoughts are that they know that nothing will happen as a consequence of their actions. Can u imagine kids 20 years ago even contemplating behaving like this in public ? There is a lack of morality in so many of this generation that they could even remotely think shit like this is acceptable
Please, can we stop with the “this generation” crap. I can certainly imagine this happening in the 70’s. Kids abusing people with mental or physical disabilities isn’t new and it isn’t restricted to kids.
Blaming the younger generation is just a way of avoiding blaming our generations for allowing this to happen. After all it’s our generations that raised these kids and their parents.
Comments
I just can’t fathom the fact people just ignored it.
Just ignore the abusers and go have a chat with the abused. This avoids confrontation and gets the job done in terms of helping and reassuring the abused.
This goes for racism, disablism, homophobia...
If there are not many people around think about your actions as these shitbags are just dying for the excuse to escalate with you being thier target.
And I should add. Getting your phone out and filming might not be a good idea if you're spotted. Put it on record in your pocket.
Really good advice. I remember giving it billy big bollocks here years ago when people were complaining about racism at football and asking why they didn't challenge it. Being older and hopefully more mature I understand that it's not that straight forward.
Whilst I would like to think I would try and step in im not so cocksure as I was when younger because there are so many incidents of the scum that walks among us stabbing those who intervene etc so the above is really excellent advice.
As for the pondlife who are responsible for this then they will eventually meet bigger and scummier pondlife in their tragic little existences and get what they are due.
Don't let scum like this get you down Tom, focus on the positive messages on this thread and well wishes from the Charlton family.
I like the idea about inserting yourself between the abusers and abused and ignoring the abusers whilst comforting the victim.
There's an American program called What Would You Do, where they get actors to act out scenarios involving prejudices of one form or other, and see how members of the public react. Get it up on YouTube, they're quite interesting
Have done so a number of times over the years. Did it before at a boxing night years ago to some knuckledragger and fortunately he piped down. Would I do it so readily now and risked getting "shanked" for "disresepecting" some lowlife inadequate on a bus nowdays and risk leaving my kids fatherless...probably not.
Too many stories of people intervening and getting head kicked in/ stabbed/ killed by the feral wannabe gangsters and so commonplace that it barely makes the front pages these days that it certainly does or should make you think twice.
Yes ideally we should step in and stand up and I always used to berate others for not doing so and was very confident that I would but couldn't honestly say I always and immediately would these days. Too much at risk.
There's ways to deal with it after the event without directly intervening at the time which may not always deescalate the situation but would actually even escalate things.
Maybe it is because I am old and don’t give a shit. An heroic death isn’t the worse way to go.
In the real world if you had gone and sat with the victim then you would have simply ended up as the target yourself.
Realistically the only thing that would stop scum like this is if a bigger, older group intervened. As Gary said, kids don't give a fuck these days.
Blame, if that is an appropriate term, is with the murderers, not the protective dad.
In saying that, it reminds me of a situation I found myself in over North Woolwich when I lived there. My then partner's daughter was dating a lad who was from another part of East London and, unbeknownst to us, he'd been having this ongoing tit for tat battle with some of the local boys whenever he visited on his scooter. I won't go into what he done leading up to this, but it ended up with 4 car loads outside my partners front door, armed with baseball bats and dog chains (possible knives tucked away aswell) wanting him outside. Tbh he was very apologetic to us and was game enough to go out and have it out with them, which left me stood in the front yard / doorway between them. It all happened so quickly and all I could think was, don't show them any fear. This went on for what seemed like a lifetime, until you could hear police sirens in the distance and they went. (Tbh - that was just the start of it) the only way I could guarantee we didn't need to sleep with one eye open every night was to walk into a packed pub by myself, owned by a couple of the lads dad and promise him the boyfriend wouldn't be welcomed round my partners house ever again.
When it's family or friends, I think this kind of thing happens organically, but with strangers, even a split second could possibly be enough to make the decision to not get involved in the same way
Its the way I was brought up.
Doubt that will ever change all the while I have a tongue in my head.
I really don’t understand how one could not.
I see Tom is at the Womens game today. Some great photos coming out.
The lad should be applauded from on high for not letting these pond life drag him down 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
(As in violent, physical confrontation will likely arise far easier).