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Nutty things you do when there is no one else around (non-sexual)

124

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  • 3blokes
    3blokes Posts: 4,610
    I joined a circus for a while juggling tippex bottles that were on fire ;-)
    In the end I decided that long holidays were more my thing so I became a teacher ;-)
  • Granpa
    Granpa Posts: 2,995

    WSS said:
    See how far I can walk down the road with my eyes closed

    Hahaha fantastic!


    No good talking back to him, he's just gone down a manhole !
  • Mr. Happy
    Mr. Happy Posts: 653
    Rehearse arguments I intend on having, including hand signals and rolling my eyes when I imagine what they might say back to me. It can get quite heated sometimes.
  • EastStand
    EastStand Posts: 4,109
    I talk to myself constatly. It's gotten to the point where I find myself threatening violence towards inanimate objects.
    Not so good when working behind a quiet bar and the customers can hear you muttering angry threats at the ale pumps.
  • Gammysnr
    Gammysnr Posts: 540
    Wrap my arms around myself with my front to a wall, so it looks like someone is hugging me and make all the related noises.
  • NathanPrior
    NathanPrior Posts: 3,577
    The other month I ran up the stairs shouting "na na na na na Batman!"
  • nth_london_addick
    nth_london_addick Posts: 35,919
    NathanPrior said:

    The other month I ran up the stairs shouting show us ya willy and got caught by my boss

  • Its_Hamer_Time
    Its_Hamer_Time Posts: 1,565
    nth london addick said:

    NathanPrior said:

    The other month I ran up the stairs shouting show us ya willy and got caught by my boss

    That one just killed me......spat water all over the desk. Brilliant!

  • Davo55
    Davo55 Posts: 7,836
    Point my fingers, like a gun, at the people on the tv and shoot them with a loud fart
  • AddickUpNorth
    AddickUpNorth Posts: 8,325
    Dress my cats up as the Pips and pretend I'm Gladys Knight.
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  • Stig
    Stig Posts: 29,021
    Just recently I've been walking around the house talking like Pennywise The Clown.
  • The Red Robin
    The Red Robin Posts: 26,126
    tangoflash said:

    In depth interview with myself after a FM session..............

    Yes! I do that all the time. Full-on press conference after a new signing too.
  • Macronate
    Macronate Posts: 12,890
    pitch business ideas to the Dragons, usually in my car.

    pretend I'm cooking for the Masterchef judges sometimes.
  • Mortimerician
    Mortimerician Posts: 5,222
    maybe_baby said:

    If the gf goes to bed early I tell the dog a bedtime story.

    image

  • Its_Hamer_Time
    Its_Hamer_Time Posts: 1,565
    Sing in a funny voice while doing a Smithy style robot dance. No idea why, but it entertains me.
  • Mortimerician
    Mortimerician Posts: 5,222
    Commentate on urination.

    "That's one of the best 10 pisses of the year. A fine effort and I can only see there being more to come from the lad".

    Who knows why.
  • church-lane
    church-lane Posts: 934
    If something annoys me on the telly, I pretend to plant some explosives under it, walk backwards uncoiling a roll of fuse wire, connect to a detonator box, unwind the plunger then press down with as much effort as I can muster. Wild west/world war 2 style. Suppose I could just use the remote!!
  • North Lower Neil
    North Lower Neil Posts: 22,943
    edited October 2013
    The Football Manager thing, too.

    Work out zombie apocalypse escape routes/plan of actions.

    Sing Macy Gray - I Try with full croaky voice.

    Doodle on my arm to work out what I'd look like with tattoos.

    See how far I can lean without falling over. Fail.

    Sit on my legs so they go to sleep then try to stand up and stagger to the kitchen.
  • adamtheaddick
    adamtheaddick Posts: 8,664
    Moon stomp. Sing in the club style. Do partridge and facejacker voices.
  • ValleyGary
    ValleyGary Posts: 37,973
    Impersonate the Indian bloke that stounds outside Charing Cross giving out ''Freeee Stylissst" magazine.
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  • Solidgone
    Solidgone Posts: 10,205
    In the lift when its says "Going up"....I would say "come on you Addicks" but I just hate it when the lift says "Going down" especially when we've just lost. But then I'll say "Yer going down with the Villa".
  • Mortimerician
    Mortimerician Posts: 5,222
    I do that, except I sing "down with the Pa-lass."
  • Fanny Fanackapan
    Fanny Fanackapan Posts: 18,735
    Pick my nose & flick it at the dog.

    " Here, boy !"
  • AddickUpNorth
    AddickUpNorth Posts: 8,325
    Fanny Fanackapan said:

    Pick my nose & flick it at the dog.

    " Here, boy !"


    Sorry to say Dame Fanackapan but you've shocked me there. I had you down as the epitome of class and sophistication. Your proclamation has brought back the pain I felt when I found out Father Christmas wasn't real.
  • Carter
    Carter Posts: 14,240
    Nose picking is a problem apparently but I can spend an hour merrily mining my gazon holes whem in isolation

    And watching chick flicks

    And drinking lambrini
  • Riviera
    Riviera Posts: 8,167
    As long as the "non sexual" caveat remains in the title, I have nothing to add to this thread....
  • rikofold
    rikofold Posts: 4,051
    AddickUpNorth said:

    Fanny Fanackapan said:

    Pick my nose & flick it at the dog.

    " Here, boy !"


    Sorry to say Dame Fanackapan but you've shocked me there. I had you down as the epitome of class and sophistication. Your proclamation has brought back the pain I felt when I found out Father Christmas wasn't real.
    What?!!?!
  • The_Organiser
    The_Organiser Posts: 3,999
    I often Imagine we're playing some huge away game (Usually palace or millwall in the FA Cup Qtr final - big away support etc) and that we've gone 2-0 down......then the comeback starts with me imagining the goals and acting out the absolute mental celebrations in our end (sometimes involving pitch encroachment if im really feeling it) as we claw back to win it 3-2 in the last min.
    The winning goal is usually a 'parker at Leeds' dribble through their defence or a solly break away up the right, cross and diving header from our forward.
    This has been happening for years - only been caught by the mrs once as I was going ape shit in the living room!!
  • Fanny Fanackapan
    Fanny Fanackapan Posts: 18,735
    AddickUpNorth said:

    Fanny Fanackapan said:

    Pick my nose & flick it at the dog.

    " Here, boy !"


    Sorry to say Dame Fanackapan but you've shocked me there. I had you down as the epitome of class and sophistication. Your proclamation has brought back the pain I felt when I found out Father Christmas wasn't real.
    Sorry, AUN ( hangs head in shame)

    It is my one & only vice though.....

    Shall we be seeing you tomorrow ? I could offer you a couple of my "lucky" choccy fingers at halftime but you might wonder where they'd been !

  • paulbaconsarnie
    paulbaconsarnie Posts: 9,423
    When there's no traffic about I often "take the racing line" whilst providing a slow motion replay of my formula1 victory in the southeast London street circuit Grand Prix.

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