Business critical question - need help before 5.20pm if possible please
Comments
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I think it's disgusting that some people turn up for work stinking of sweat. I have a shower every month whether I need one or not.19
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Just send him a link to this thread5
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have what you want to say wrote out on cards in black felt tip.
Go out and hire one of those chemical protection suits and walk up to his / her desk and go through the cards one by one
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Fair enough.ForeverAddickted said:
I dont think clueless is the right word... Think there are some on here who just dont take life seriously (me included)iainment said:This type of thread shows there are some here who know how to deal with these issues empathetically.
And some who are clueless when it comes to dealing with people.2 -
can I just say that you are right to tell him. My mother in law had a district nurse round a few months ago and he stunk. It was just the once so we didn't say anything. However, we found out from another nurse a couple of weeks later that he'd had to have his leg amputated as it had gangrene. He hadn't told/seen anyone about his condition and his work mates had been too embarrassed to tell him that he smelt. Now they wish they had. Not saying it's this serious but don't just assume it's body odour.3
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I've read that six or seven times and there's no crude remarks or innuendo, quite frankly I'm appalled.DaveMehmet said:Have had to do this myself. No real easy way but make sure you do it away from the rest of team and say something along the lines of "without wishing to cause offence, we thought you should be made aware that the team have noticed that you have a strong body odour. Apologies if there's a medical reason for this but we've all noticed it, is there anything I/we can do to help"
Try and be as sensitive as you can but you will need to get the message across.
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Be careful mate.....some of the other 'advice' may not always be appropriate.cabbles said:Cheers all. Will go with @DaveMehmet advice
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Agreed... When I saw Cabbles was going to take Dave's advice my instant reaction was... Errr WHAT?T.C.E said:
I've read that six or seven times and there's no crude remarks or innuendo, quite frankly I'm appalled.DaveMehmet said:Have had to do this myself. No real easy way but make sure you do it away from the rest of team and say something along the lines of "without wishing to cause offence, we thought you should be made aware that the team have noticed that you have a strong body odour. Apologies if there's a medical reason for this but we've all noticed it, is there anything I/we can do to help"
Try and be as sensitive as you can but you will need to get the message across.
To be fair though it is very good advice1 -
I think I'll try that with my staff in future.LargeAddick said:can I just say that you are right to tell him. My mother in law had a district nurse round a few months ago and he stunk. It was just the once so we didn't say anything. However, we found out from another nurse a couple of weeks later that he'd had to have his leg amputated as it had gangrene. He hadn't told/seen anyone about his condition and his work mates had been too embarrassed to tell him that he smelt. Now they wish they had. Not saying it's this serious but don't just assume it's body odour.
'I think you might have gangrene and need your leg amputated '
should go down well.13 -
It's not my son is it3
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Honesty and a sympathetic attitude is definitely the best policy here - BUT - I would advise against telling him that the whole office have noticed. Better for him to think it's just you who is either
a) doing him a favour before everyone else notices or
b) an insensitive bastard.
Imagine how humiliated he'd feel coming out of the meeting knowing everyone else has been talking about how smelly he is. Nobody needs that.
Having said all that, if he asks you who thinks he smells, don't lie.6 -
I found that if everyone in the office makes the effort, then they generally get the idea if you all come to work dressed like this.
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Start off with word association.
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This is true - plus there's only 8 of us including him. I don't want him to think we've all been chatting about it etc as an ongoing topic of conversationlordromford said:Honesty and a sympathetic attitude is definitely the best policy here - BUT - I would advise against telling him that the whole office have noticed. Better for him to think it's just you who is either
a) doing him a favour before everyone else notices or
b) an insensitive bastard.
Imagine how humiliated he'd feel coming out of the meeting knowing everyone else has been talking about how smelly he is. Nobody needs that.
Having said all that, if he asks you who thinks he smells, don't lie.
However, whatever way I tell him he'll feel a bit deflated. Just gotta bite the bullet here0 -
I think we're all surprised you haven't written out an email to the offender @Cabbles...
Usually your not at a loss when putting pen to paper3 -
These are very diplomatic answers.. I'm disappointed.
May I suggest interpretative dance? Or maybe a limerick?0 -
Yep. Can't get away from that. Hopefully he'll take it in the spirit it's intended and view it as a lesson learned. Good luck.cabbles said:
This is true - plus there's only 8 of us including him. I don't want him to think we've all been chatting about it etc as an ongoing topic of conversationlordromford said:Honesty and a sympathetic attitude is definitely the best policy here - BUT - I would advise against telling him that the whole office have noticed. Better for him to think it's just you who is either
a) doing him a favour before everyone else notices or
b) an insensitive bastard.
Imagine how humiliated he'd feel coming out of the meeting knowing everyone else has been talking about how smelly he is. Nobody needs that.
Having said all that, if he asks you who thinks he smells, don't lie.
However, whatever way I tell him he'll feel a bit deflated. Just gotta bite the bullet here0 -
I have no advice to offer as I can absolutely guarantee that you're less socially awkward than me in these kinds of situations.
Just here for the update after you've told him.3 -
Just be straight and honest ...
Dave, there is no easy way to say this so I'll give it to you straight. YOU STINK .....Take a shower, perleeeez (then walk off)0 -
Tell him privately but honestly; dont hint or buy deodrant ect. just be straight0
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I used to work in an office with 6 others. One bloke used to do the most pungent farts ever. He would just say 'pardon me' once the waft had reached someone. Seriously, it was unbearable to breathe and we used to go out. It was so bad one day that when I washed my hair that evening I could smell it again. But we all just put up with it - tbh there was nothing we could do.11
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As others have said, do it discretely and privately, maybe disguise it as something else so that it he doesn't think the whole office knows what the conversation is about, even if they do!0
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To be entirely honest, if you're not HR or his line manager then I'd be a bit pissed off if I was you - and subsequently I'd do it quite informally.
Ask him for a word and go in to a well ventilated but empty room, and just say "Hey mate, this is a bit of an awkward one but don't worry. I know this summer has been a bit of a scorcher and everything, but you're giving off a bit of a unhealthy smell at the moment. Is there everything alright and is therr anything we can do?". Once the ice has broken then it should be a lot easier, maybe end the conversation with a quick light hearted bit of advice that will make him feel a bit easier - i.e "A bloke down the gym had a bit of a go at me a few months ago actually, rude wanker. Anyway, he did tell me about this deodorant by xxxx which is brilliant, smells decent too. I dont go out without it anymore hah" - even if its bullshit. If he thinks you've been in a similar boat and are being helpful, he may welcome your advice.
The issue is, if it's a health condition then that needs to be accounted for - but if it's a health condition then tbh nobody has any right to ask other than management and HR. So I'd be pretty careful to be entirely honest, not only for his dignity and your own embarassment, but this has the potential to go very wrong IMO.
I think Henry works in HR (?) so perhaps heed his advice quite carefully.6 -
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I like it, slide it in there subtly.SouthWest_Addicks said:Start off with word association.
Think of something that links these words...
Skunk, garbage, strong cheese, your overall body odour in the office, nappies2 -
Feck all that chief---- had to tell a transgender person to stop using the ladies toilets once --- after complaints from the ladies.
Or telling a young lady that she wasn't going clubbing or fecking surfing and she should dress correctly for ExxonMobil HQ---- didn't go down well that one0 -
Just hope when he deflates, he doesn't let off too much of a smellcabbles said:
This is true - plus there's only 8 of us including him. I don't want him to think we've all been chatting about it etc as an ongoing topic of conversationlordromford said:Honesty and a sympathetic attitude is definitely the best policy here - BUT - I would advise against telling him that the whole office have noticed. Better for him to think it's just you who is either
a) doing him a favour before everyone else notices or
b) an insensitive bastard.
Imagine how humiliated he'd feel coming out of the meeting knowing everyone else has been talking about how smelly he is. Nobody needs that.
Having said all that, if he asks you who thinks he smells, don't lie.
However, whatever way I tell him he'll feel a bit deflated. Just gotta bite the bullet here6 -
Was he wearing a Palace shirt and carrying a notebook and a copy of the South London Press?Curb_It said:There was a bloke in my gym, perfectly presentable looking, but as soon as he started running on the treadmill he let off a vile pungent smell. It was so odd. You couldn't be in the cardio room at the same time... as soon as I saw his ginger mop walk in most walked out.
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The irony is my company runs corporate events for HR Directors, so yes I know all about this. However being 8 people and me being one of the long severs I'll have to do it as we have no HR managerLuckyReds said:To be entirely honest, if you're not HR or his line manager then I'd be a bit pissed off if I was you - and subsequently I'd do it quite informally.
Ask him for a word and go in to a well ventilated but empty room, and just say "Hey mate, this is a bit of an awkward one but don't worry. I know this summer has been a bit of a scorcher and everything, but you're giving off a bit of a unhealthy smell at the moment. Is there everything alright and is therr anything we can do?". Once the ice has broken then it should be a lot easier, maybe end the conversation with a quick light hearted bit of advice that will make him feel a bit easier - i.e "A bloke down the gym had a bit of a go at me a few months ago actually, rude wanker. Anyway, he did tell me about this deodorant by xxxx which is brilliant, smells decent too. I dont go out without it anymore hah" - even if its bullshit. If he thinks you've been in a similar boat and are being helpful, he may welcome your advice.
The issue is, if it's a health condition then that needs to be accounted for - but if it's a health condition then tbh nobody has any right to ask other than management and HR. So I'd be pretty careful to be entirely honest, not only for his dignity and your own embarassment, but this has the potential to go very wrong IMO.
I think Henry works in HR (?) so perhaps heed his advice quite carefully.
I think Hemry is marketing - the legend that is Bob Munro is our HR guru
Yet he's an a HR Director so is probably too strategic for this sort of issue 2 -
A friend of mine also had to tell a coworker the same thing and was really anxious about how to deliver the message, even to the point that he was practising in the mirror.
When he called the meeting to tell his colleague, he immediately froze, panicked and came out with the immortal words of "Simon, you fucking stink mate"18
