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Business critical question - need help before 5.20pm if possible please

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Comments

  • SWEnglandAddick
    SWEnglandAddick Posts: 877
    I work for a HR magazine, I'll try and dig out some advice
  • Arsenetatters
    Arsenetatters Posts: 5,976
    SWEnglandAddick said:

    I work for a HR magazine, I'll try and dig out some advice

    You're going to have to dig quickly!
  • Macronate
    Macronate Posts: 12,897
    3 minutes to go, then Cabbles is going to do this to someone;

    image
  • MrLargo
    MrLargo Posts: 7,991
    SWEnglandAddick said:

    I work for a HR magazine, I'll try and dig out some advice

    You've got four minutes.

    Good luck Cabbles. I would always say start off by taking a good, deep breath - in this case make sure you do it before you're in the room with him.
  • SWEnglandAddick
    SWEnglandAddick Posts: 877
    Arsenetatters said:

    SWEnglandAddick said:

    I work for a HR magazine, I'll try and dig out some advice

    You're going to have to dig quickly!
    Could only find "Top 10 worst smells at work":
    1. Sweaty smells
    2. Bad breath
    3. Bad wind
    4. Smelly feet
    5. Fishy foods
    6. Other body odours
    7. Spicy foods
    8. Meaty foods
    9. Cooked vegetables
    10. Cigarette smoke
  • TelMc32
    TelMc32 Posts: 9,056
    Arsenetatters said:

    I used to work in an office with 6 others. One bloke used to do the most pungent farts ever. He would just say 'pardon me' once the waft had reached someone. Seriously, it was unbearable to breathe and we used to go out. It was so bad one day that when I washed my hair that evening I could smell it again. But we all just put up with it - tbh there was nothing we could do.

    Jeez @Arsenetatters...were you under his desk when he let rip???? :wink:
  • LuckyReds
    LuckyReds Posts: 5,866
    edited September 2016
    Fuck it, just chicken out and bring some clothes pegs in tomorrow.

    image
  • Addickted2TheReds
    Addickted2TheReds Posts: 7,736
    edited September 2016
    I'll be pissed off if the report back is "he took it really well, no problems and thanked me for making him aware".

    I want swearing, violence and weapons (preferably, but not limited to, a gun).
  • cafcdave123
    cafcdave123 Posts: 11,491
    edited September 2016
    Cough smelly t cough, see you tomorrow mate...
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  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,436
    God its a small world... Never realised I worked with Cabbles!!
  • Henry Irving
    Henry Irving Posts: 85,234
    If cables doesn't update in next 20 mins he has to be banned for three games
  • Addickted2TheReds
    Addickted2TheReds Posts: 7,736
    Henry Irving said:

    If cables doesn't update in next 20 mins he has to be banned for three games

    He could have been killed, Ben. Very insensitive.
  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,436
    Henry Irving said:

    If cables doesn't update in next 20 mins he has to be banned for three games

    If he doesnt update in 20mins then we need someone to go round his office in a bio suit and check on him
  • LuckyReds
    LuckyReds Posts: 5,866
    edited September 2016
    You've really brightened up my afternoon @cabbles - not going to lie, I hope you have a few more embarrassing incidents lined up because they're cracking threads.

    I hope part two is a full on stench of excrement though. Preferably with some shit stains thrown in for good measure. "How would you teach a coworker to wipe properly?" would be excellent.
  • Henry Irving
    Henry Irving Posts: 85,234
    Addickted2TheReds said:

    Henry Irving said:

    If cables doesn't update in next 20 mins he has to be banned for three games

    He could have been killed, Ben. Very insensitive.
    Pathetic excuse
  • SouthWest_Addicks
    SouthWest_Addicks Posts: 6,307
    Have you resulted to producing a PowerPoint and a graph to get your message across.
  • cabbles
    cabbles Posts: 15,256
    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave
  • Addickted2TheReds
    Addickted2TheReds Posts: 7,736
    Fiiish said:

    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    Are you hiring?
    Beat me to it.

    (I don't smell, either!)
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  • cafcfan
    cafcfan Posts: 11,199
    This nice chart might help. It's laminated and will wipe clean.


    image
  • cabbles
    cabbles Posts: 15,256
    Fiiish said:

    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    Are you hiring?
    WeWork Paddington - trendy 'new world of work' etc
  • Chris_from_Sidcup
    Chris_from_Sidcup Posts: 36,028
    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    Say he leaves before the other 2?
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,859
    "Bra... ya reek blud!"

    "Man dem cyaan deal, innit."

    "Ya need a fresh, ya get me?"

    "Irie."

    Job done.
  • Macronate
    Macronate Posts: 12,897
    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    image
  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,436
    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    Just scream at them... Would you two FUCK OFF, I'm trying to tell Steve here he's a smelly bastard like you lot asked me to and I wanna go home myself!!
  • CAFCsayer
    CAFCsayer Posts: 10,228
    You have draught beer on tap in your office? Just get him slaughtered and put him in the shower... Job done
  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,436
    Just hope Cabbles doesnt fart during the chat... Be a bit rich the complaint coming from him then
  • EastStand
    EastStand Posts: 4,109
    cabbles said:

    Fiiish said:

    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    Are you hiring?
    WeWork Paddington - trendy 'new world of work' etc
    My company is in the WHSQ one - just had a pint myself :-)
  • Addick Addict
    Addick Addict Posts: 39,807
    cabbles said:

    Haven't done it yet. Just got him a beer (they have it on tap in our office). Just waiting for 2 people to leave

    You do know that reeking of beer isn't a "normal" office smell - and just because he uses Brut or Old Spice isn't a reason "to have a word".

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