Chat up lines

Gumbo

Just thinking with ball mouth coming up on sat! Anyone got any classic/cheesy/crap chat up lines

Man:- "you Irish love?"
Women:- "No why"
Man:- "coz everytime I look at you my cocks Dublin"

Great chat up line from a movie

Stu_of_Kunming

Dicko: "Can you hold my pint a second"
Kets: "Sure thing"
Kets: "What the f***"

Seemed to work pretty well in blackpool!

adamtheaddick

I know ricky Gervais.. ;-)

67% of the time it works everytime.

Paddy from phoenix nights used a belter,

"Alright love, nice legs.. what time do they open?"

RedArmySE7

"Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiece"

Plaaayer

Do you work for DHL? Because I saw you checking out my package.

Plaaayer

Fancy a night at the Hilton?

Worked last week.

Baldybonce

For any bird of a foriegn persuasion.
Have you got any English in you?
No.
Would you like some?

Gumbo

"does this napkin smell of rolhypnole"

nth_london_addick

2 birds together walk over to them and ask one


Do you like to dance

if she says yes

Tell her to fook off then cos i want to talk to your pal





Alternatively

Walk up to her and say i might not be the best looking bloke in here


but i am the only one talking to you






Or the one that serves me best




Dont turn this rape in to a murder

MrOneLung

"does this napkin smell of rolhypnole"

Rohypnol doesnt smell - do you mean chloroform ?

bolloxbolder

NLA should be struck off for that.

O-Randy-Hunt

Me - Can I smell your f*nny

Girl - F**k off

Me - oh, must be your feet then

MrOneLung

Me - would you like to dance?
Her - no I would never dance with you?
Me - you misheard me, I said that dress makes your arse look fat


Surely the best chat up line is Hi, can I get you a drink.

Gumbo

Either way same out come?!

adamtheaddick

There are 256 bones in your body! Would you like another?

Plaaayer

Hello Mrs Wiseman.

Bryan_Kynsie

Are you free later this evening? No? Oh alright, how much then?

DaveMehmet

Do you like fruit?

Yes

Then suck my c*ck it's a peach

tangoflash

This one works every time:

Here love, drink this, it's fine..................

MCS

Have you ever had ya belly button licked.............. From the inside!

Deadred

Back in the day before mobile phones it used to be

bloke 'have you got 10p love?'
girl 'no why?'
bloke 'you need to give your mum a ring to tell her you won't be home tonight'

adamtheaddick

"whats that in my pocket you say.. just some gaffer tape and a stanley knife.. another drink?"

Chirpy Red

"You look like my 3rd wife"

"How many have you had?"

"Two....."

cafcdave123

just get your cock out and say

"'ere love, get your laughing gear round that"

Deadred

just get your cock out and say

"'ere love, get your laughing gear round that"

Subtle dave very subtle!

jdsd42

Hi ..yes i am a Millionaire ............sure to work

SuperCliveMendonca

Do you come here often?

adamtheaddick

"thats so funny i love hannah montana too..."

BIG_ROB

"Hello, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you"

Saga Lout

"Ey up Luv! Those clothes would look great in a heap on my bedroom floor!".

Dizzle

Would you like one thats funny, but also a bit cheesey to make them laugh at the same time?

You approach them and you say to them "Hey, look, feel this" and hand them part of your clothing. Maybe a cuff, maybe part of a jumper or shirt. They have a feel and usually look a bit confused. Then you say "do you know what that is?" ... They still look confused. "No" they reply. "Boyfriend material" you remark, with a wink.

Then listen as the waves break in her fanny