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Chat up lines

135

Comments

  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,822
    On a serious note, a good bit of palm reading was always a winner. Just adapt what you say to what you think she wants to hear. Just make them laugh and don't treat the chat up stage as anything other than a bit of fun.

    @johnboyuk will tell you back in the day I was the absolute master of bull**it.
  • DaveMehmet
    DaveMehmet Posts: 21,590
    Im gutted!
  • SE10
    SE10 Posts: 2,169
    I'm not really this tall, I'm sitting on my wallet!
  • JohnBoyUK
    JohnBoyUK Posts: 9,017
    On a serious note, a good bit of palm reading was always a winner. Just adapt what you say to what you think she wants to hear. Just make them laugh and don't treat the chat up stage as anything other than a bit of fun.

    @johnboyuk will tell you back in the day I was the absolute master of bull**it.
    The master. The absolute master.

  • Smell this

    (1hr later )


    It hurts your arse dont it
  • O-Randy-Hunt
    O-Randy-Hunt Posts: 10,632
    'morning'
    Went down well in sheffield gaz. Lol
  • Curb_It
    Curb_It Posts: 21,218
    Smell this

    (1hr later )


    It hurts your arse dont it
    ugh

  • Wheresmeticket
    Wheresmeticket Posts: 17,304
    "Hi. I'm a bit depressed at the moment".




    I'm still working on this as I feel it needs a bit of fine tuning.
  • adamtheaddick
    adamtheaddick Posts: 8,664
    can you help me get this sofa into the back of my van..

    followed shortly by put the lotion in the basket..
  • 'You don't sweat much for a fat bird'
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  • Karim_myBagheri
    Karim_myBagheri Posts: 12,691
    If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
  • Smell this

    (1hr later )


    It hurts your arse dont it
    ugh


    LOL its a quality one B

  • Karim_myBagheri
    Karim_myBagheri Posts: 12,691
    are you a dab hand with a mastic gun?
  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,822
    Can you juggle ? We'll lets start with two balls and see how you get on
  • Lincsaddick
    Lincsaddick Posts: 32,345
    Excuse me sweetheaert .. your panties are falling down
    Ooooohhhh... how do you know?

    I just decided
  • Addicted
    Addicted Posts: 2,804
    You look like you've got fairly low self-esteem

    Yeah you'll do
  • masicat
    masicat Posts: 5,008
    ''As long as Iv'e got a face you'll always have a place to sit''!
  • RedArmySE7
    RedArmySE7 Posts: 5,407
    I was once chatted up by a girl telling me I had "A comfy looking face"!
  • Henry Irving
    Henry Irving Posts: 85,213
    On a serious note, a good bit of palm reading was always a winner. Just adapt what you say to what you think she wants to hear. Just make them laugh and don't treat the chat up stage as anything other than a bit of fun.
    Brings back memories : - )

  • ValleyGary
    ValleyGary Posts: 37,973
    'morning'
    Went down well in sheffield gaz. Lol
    haha dont tell me you wont be using it in bournemouth on sat

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  • Brunello
    Brunello Posts: 1,950
    I've always found " do you want to come on my boat" works
  • adamtheaddick
    adamtheaddick Posts: 8,664
    my mate fancies you..
  • Macronate
    Macronate Posts: 12,890
    my love for you is like diarehha. i can't hold it in.

    here's £20. drink until i'm really good looking then come & chat to me.
  • Karim_myBagheri
    Karim_myBagheri Posts: 12,691
    dont worry. the clinic gave me the all clear.
  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,822


    here's £20. drink until i'm really good looking then come & chat to me.
    Think she is going to need a fifty.....
  • Lincsaddick
    Lincsaddick Posts: 32,345
    I was once chatted up by a girl telling me I had "A comfy looking face"!
    and the punchline is ????? ... she ended up sitting on it ?
  • sam3110
    sam3110 Posts: 21,242
    Hi, I may not be Ray Mears, Ranulph Fiennes or even Bear Grylls, but I bet I could navigate your Khyber Pass
  • Macronate
    Macronate Posts: 12,890


    here's £20. drink until i'm really good looking then come & chat to me.
    Think she is going to need a fifty.....
    happy hour!
  • adamtheaddick
    adamtheaddick Posts: 8,664
    i know im fat but am i am one of the jolly ones, and the way im heading will lose a leg to diabites any month now so will get a blue badge, free parking!! its a win win situation for you..
  • redsek
    redsek Posts: 656
    'Life without you would be like a broken pencil....... pointless.'

    Works even after only having known them for 10 minutes. Honest.