I listen to about 15-20 minutes on the way home from work every morning, only because I can't be bothered to change the station. They had Justin's niece on talking about it, she said she knows a number of gay footballers in the championship and the premier league. Jamie O'Hara was on the other day saying that he shared a dressing room with 2 gay players, all the other players, coaches etc knew but everyone respected they weren't "out". Not sure how true that is.
Statistically there should be at least 2 LBGT players in every Premier league 1st team squad.
I think it was @bobmunro who mentioned the rugby players, apologies if it wasn't. It's a fair point about the dressing room culture but how many rugby players could walk down the street, especially in a foreign country and not be recognised? Would the Deli Ali non story this week of happened to someone form an other sport?
I personally don't get why anyone has to be open about their sexuality, but no one should be forced to hide it either. Just live and let live.
If you were LBGT and weren't "out" to your work mates would you be happy taking your partner to a works do? If your a footballer, or anyone else in the public eye, you can't lead a normal life if your hiding your sexuality.
Of course your right, that's how it should be, unfortunately we all know that's not how easy life is, even in 2019.
Interesting story, or not? Someone I currently work with joined our department from another, he would always refer to 'partner' or Christina, 6 months down the line some of the girls in the office basically saw through instagram that 'she' was in fact ' he' but he continued to still refer to his 'Mrs' everytime , which started getting a bit annoying. A team leader mentioned in a 1-2-1 people think you have a BF not a GF, to gauge their reaction and hopefully get them to just not lie, this did not come out still.
Eventually probably a year down the line, he suddenly refer to Christopher not Christina. My Boyfriend, whilst I know it must be very hard but it was the whole ordeal and the constant lies which started to annoy people, once we knew it kind of made sense but before then no one would have any idea. It was also bad as it must have been so hard for him to live every day life knowing they were lieing.
Cliffs- Noone was any different after the event and basically it would have been better for him if he had been open from the off
This reminded me of when my wife used to work in a hairdressers, where many of the blokes were gay. We were at a party and I was talking to this person (in a group as you do). I couldn't work out if it was a boy or a girl. The hairstyle and clothing did not help, as it suggested a girl or perhaps gay man. It didn't really matter of course, although it did seem to make my conversation a bit undecided. Perhaps, I didn't know whether to talk footie or possibly something that they might be more interested in.
Anyway, after what seemed like an age I said to the wife, anyway you never introduced us properly.
She replied, ah yes "this is Chris". I'm thinking great, that really helps :-)
So - a lot of people seem to be saying "a player's sexuality doesn't matter to me/I couldn't care less" - so on, so forth, similar sentiments.
This is, on the surface of things, all very well and good.
However, it does also present somewhat of a problem, especially in the context of association football. Let me see if I can explain in relative brevity. And I'm fully aware I'm about to sound like a softy liberal type.
My first question would be - do you have to come out if you're straight? Most of you would say "No of course not, that's ludicrous" - and fair enough, because to identify as cisgender (i.e. if your gender identity conforms to your biological sex) and heterosexual is seen as the overwhelming norm throughout the world.
So, to admit that you're different, if you're gay/bi/trans/anything else on the spectrum, somewhere in between things, whatever - that takes 1) an incredible amount of courage to deviate from what is "normal"; 2) a significant period of time where one has to come to terms with "who one is"; and 3) a lot of consideration as to how people will react.
Because there are still homophobes in this world, as much as there are racists and other bigots.
Couple coming out with a sport that is infamous for its historically casually homophobic attitude, and you're in a very difficult position. To say "oh but it won't matter to me/couldn't care less" - sure, fair enough and good on ya, but that sort of ignores the discrimination and hate the LGBTQ+ community face on a daily basis.
It reminds me a little of that Edmund Burke quote - "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good [people] to do nothing."
As a footballing community, we should be encouraging people to come out. We should create a space where their sexuality is meaningless. I look forward to the day where no-one gives a toss (much like no-one should give a toss about skin colour). No-one can change their sexuality or gender identity.
And if we can create a space where they're accepted as is (but, of course, being told they're shit at football if they're shit at football or whatever), then we'll be getting there.
Much of your post is as usual spot on.
You can't say though to encourage people coming out will lead to a space in which their sexuality meaningless.
If you put everyone who comes out under the microscope it makes it a bigger deal than it is.
I'd be far happier if we learned of these things how we do in normal life or not at all.
This is how I learned a colleague is gay just last week.
He got a promotion and I simply asked: "How did you celebrate your promotion"
His response: "My partner took me out for a meal, he knew just what would make my day"
I replied simply with something like "Where did you go?"
That was it. No highlighting it, just respond as I would have anyone else.
It's not hard to treat LGBTQQIA people normally, Especially if you're an adult with a tiny spec of empathy about not making a big deal of normal things.
There was a nasty attack on two gay women on a bus not long ago. It seems understandable that in the current climate a gay person would watch their back in all circumstances, including weighing up issues around being 'out'. I find it hard to believe that this is a cynical money making venture thought up by an U23 footballer, but if there are others giving advice they might venture into exploitation territory.
Dazzler, I'd suggest the comment is not aimed at people like you, but the rather the likes of smudge7946 who feel homosexuals are less able to remain professional than 'straight' men.
Their name will certainly be interesting when released
Are they a First-Team player already well known and on the up within the game
Or are they someone actually within an U23 squad, has only really been on loan deep within the Non-League structure, wont get far as a professional Footballer (so many will respond with "WHO!!" when he comes out) and so is now building around this as something to fall back upon
It is disappointing we have to be skeptical of many things in life these days
Dazzler, I'd suggest the comment is not aimed at people like you, but the rather the likes of smudge7946 who feel homosexuals are less able to remain professional than 'straight' men.
Yeah but smudge is the most macho straight of any men ever so all gay men must fancy him.
I think you may be right. I didn't see his post but have scrolled back and seen it... Seriously wtf! 😖
but football fans chanting are the least of the worry as most religions cannot abide homosexuality but we dont call them out as its frowned upon - for another day i feel.
Based on his comment in the statement "i asked questions regarding my place in the first team squad" we can surely assume it's not a major name.
Can't imagine a manager on the phone trying to sell his star player just because they're gay.
So i'm thinking it's probably a lesser known player.
However regardless of how much this person is applauded, how much support he gets etc, it's absolutely certain he'll get abuse. You only have to look at the chants at Brighton games to know that.
Based on his comment in the statement "i asked questions regarding my place in the first team squad" we can surely assume it's not a major name.
Can't imagine a manager on the phone trying to sell his star player just because they're gay.
So i'm thinking it's probably a lesser known player.
However regardless of how much this person is applauded, how much support he gets etc, it's absolutely certain he'll get abuse. You only have to look at the chants at Brighton games to know that.
The only Brighton chant I've heard is hard to get worked up about.
Based on his comment in the statement "i asked questions regarding my place in the first team squad" we can surely assume it's not a major name.
Can't imagine a manager on the phone trying to sell his star player just because they're gay.
So i'm thinking it's probably a lesser known player.
However regardless of how much this person is applauded, how much support he gets etc, it's absolutely certain he'll get abuse. You only have to look at the chants at Brighton games to know that.
Rightly or wrongly the "Brighton" thing isn't about sexuality though is it? It's a very childish play on stereo types. There are loads of others.
Everybody knows not all Brighton fans are gay, Brighton fans know everyone else knows that, everyone knows that Brighton fans know that. Everybody thinks they are being as funny and original as the fans that sang the same songs the week before. When the truth is they are being neither.
On a side note I would expect an openly gay player to receive less abuse than one that is subject to rumour and innuendo. Remember the England International that was "outed" because of the newspaper he read!?!
Based on his comment in the statement "i asked questions regarding my place in the first team squad" we can surely assume it's not a major name.
Can't imagine a manager on the phone trying to sell his star player just because they're gay.
So i'm thinking it's probably a lesser known player.
However regardless of how much this person is applauded, how much support he gets etc, it's absolutely certain he'll get abuse. You only have to look at the chants at Brighton games to know that.
Rightly or wrongly the "Brighton" thing isn't about sexuality though is it? It's a very childish play on stereo types. There are loads of others.
Everybody knows not all Brighton fans are gay, Brighton fans know everyone else knows that, everyone knows that Brighton fans know that. Everybody thinks they are being as funny and original as the fans that sang the same songs the week before. When the truth is they are being neither.
On a side note I would expect an openly gay player to receive less abuse than one that is subject to rumour and innuendo. Remember the England International that was "outed" because of the newspaper he read!?!
The only Brighton chants I've heard are only really referencing the fact that Brighton has a large gay community - they're not virulently homophobic as far as I can see?
Most chants as you say are just based on stereotypes of the area where the opposing support come from.
Comments
Statistically there should be at least 2 LBGT players in every Premier league 1st team squad.
I think it was @bobmunro who mentioned the rugby players, apologies if it wasn't. It's a fair point about the dressing room culture but how many rugby players could walk down the street, especially in a foreign country and not be recognised? Would the Deli Ali non story this week of happened to someone form an other sport?
We were at a party and I was talking to this person (in a group as you do).
I couldn't work out if it was a boy or a girl.
The hairstyle and clothing did not help, as it suggested a girl or perhaps gay man.
It didn't really matter of course, although it did seem to make my conversation a bit undecided.
Perhaps, I didn't know whether to talk footie or possibly something that they might be more interested in.
Anyway, after what seemed like an age I said to the wife, anyway you never introduced us properly.
She replied, ah yes "this is Chris".
I'm thinking great, that really helps :-)
You can't say though to encourage people coming out will lead to a space in which their sexuality meaningless.
If you put everyone who comes out under the microscope it makes it a bigger deal than it is.
I'd be far happier if we learned of these things how we do in normal life or not at all.
This is how I learned a colleague is gay just last week.
He got a promotion and I simply asked:
"How did you celebrate your promotion"
His response:
"My partner took me out for a meal, he knew just what would make my day"
I replied simply with something like
"Where did you go?"
That was it. No highlighting it, just respond as I would have anyone else.
It's not hard to treat LGBTQQIA people normally, Especially if you're an adult with a tiny spec of empathy about not making a big deal of normal things.
I find it hard to believe that this is a cynical money making venture thought up by an U23 footballer, but if there are others giving advice they might venture into exploitation territory.
Are they a First-Team player already well known and on the up within the game
Or are they someone actually within an U23 squad, has only really been on loan deep within the Non-League structure, wont get far as a professional Footballer (so many will respond with "WHO!!" when he comes out) and so is now building around this as something to fall back upon
It is disappointing we have to be skeptical of many things in life these days
Whoever they are though I wish them well
I think you may be right. I didn't see his post but have scrolled back and seen it... Seriously wtf! 😖
Can't imagine a manager on the phone trying to sell his star player just because they're gay.
So i'm thinking it's probably a lesser known player.
However regardless of how much this person is applauded, how much support he gets etc, it's absolutely certain he'll get abuse. You only have to look at the chants at Brighton games to know that.
Steve "interesting" Davies or another Steve Davies ?
If him I never knew.
Everybody knows not all Brighton fans are gay, Brighton fans know everyone else knows that, everyone knows that Brighton fans know that. Everybody thinks they are being as funny and original as the fans that sang the same songs the week before. When the truth is they are being neither.
On a side note I would expect an openly gay player to receive less abuse than one that is subject to rumour and innuendo. Remember the England International that was "outed" because of the newspaper he read!?!
Most chants as you say are just based on stereotypes of the area where the opposing support come from.
I was listening to Talksport late last night and a journalist who was on said that he'd engaged with him privately and was sure it was genuine.
I don't think he means he literally doesn't care, he is saying why does anyone care its 2019 eg. its normal...
The difference an 'e' makes.