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100 things you never knew about Ben Thatcher

AFKABartram
AFKABartram Posts: 57,820
edited July 2007 in Fun, Jokes & Captions
1. Ben Thatcher is a grade 4 ballroom dancer, who won the Under 16 national championships in 1992 for his Viennesse Walz with his partner, Judy Morris
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Comments

  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,820
    2. Ben Thatcher's favourite pastime is swimming with dolphins, and he keeps two of them (pepsi and shirley) in his garden pond at Bluewater
  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,820
    3. Ben Thatcher was so fat as a child, he once resorted to eating a badger in Oxleas Woods.
  • Off_it
    Off_it Posts: 28,832
    edited July 2007
    4. Ben Thatcher once bit the head off and dove a chewed it to the point where he swllowed it whilst on stage in his school play. When asked why he did it he replied "it was an accident".
  • les_says
    les_says Posts: 934
    edited July 2007
    ben thatcher was once married to left wing loony and former pm, margaret.

    not, as afka, claims - grandson (just saw previous post)
  • PeanutsMolloy
    PeanutsMolloy Posts: 6,704
    Ben Thatcher spent a frustrating year at a Buddhist seminary between leaving school and joining Millwall, in search of Nirvana. Unfortunately his fellow monks preferred jazz.
  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,820
    5. Ben Thatcher once officiated a fight between a shark and a hippo, but got bored and beat them both up before visiting his nan for a cup of tea and a bourbon biscuit.
  • AFKABartram
    AFKABartram Posts: 57,820
    Ben Thatcher's TV producing father got the idea for a new show after a scolding Ben screamed from the bath 'it ain't arf hot, mum'
  • les_says
    les_says Posts: 934
    this didn't put ben off bath time, in adulthood he enjoys a pipe in the tub while reading back issues of american grizzly.
  • tricky
    tricky Posts: 1,291
    Ben Thatcher ate my hamster.
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    Ben Thatcher is the Charlton Life Phantom User.
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  • Henry Irving
    Henry Irving Posts: 85,204
    Ben Thatcher is a better player than Cory Gibbs
  • tricky
    tricky Posts: 1,291
    Ben Thatcher had the original idea for Men Behaving Badly.
  • Henry Irving
    Henry Irving Posts: 85,204
    Mendes dived
  • cunningstunt87
    cunningstunt87 Posts: 1,100
    Thatcher sleeps with 2 teddys named AFKA and Lookout.
  • North Lower Neil
    North Lower Neil Posts: 22,942
    Ben Thatcher is Keyser Soze
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    As a teen, Ben Thatcher invented the BowFlex and is independently wealthy as a result. He only began playing professional football as a means to sell excercise machines to clubs, but soon found that he was better than everyone else at the training ground and kept playing. His gran was very proud of this, so he bought her a swimming pool equipped with a waterproof Stanna Stairlift.
  • Addickted
    Addickted Posts: 19,456
    Ben Thatcher once cried when I gave him a particularly nasty chinese burn.
  • Stoke_addick
    Stoke_addick Posts: 182
    Ben Thatcher told his little brother that sea otters aren't mammals, but fish, even though Ben himself is a marine biologist and knows otherwise. Ben simply wanted to see his little brother fail his class report, in order to teach him to begin projects early, which help him develop skills necessary to succeed in life
  • Chirpy Red
    Chirpy Red Posts: 7,587
    Ben, his sister Carol and his parents Den and Peggy appeared on Ask The Family. The programme was never aired after an angry Ben layed out the very smug Robert Robinson who had kept laughing at Ben's answers.
    The incident was on YouTube but has been removed.
  • JVL
    JVL Posts: 284
    Ben Thatcher was one half of Everything But The Girl.
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  • JVL
    JVL Posts: 284
    The other half was that guy who played the guitar.
  • Chirpy Red
    Chirpy Red Posts: 7,587
    Ben was the first kid in his street to get a Raleigh Grifter. He'd wanted a Chopper like his older brother Mark but they had been discontinued.
    When the Chopper was relaunched a few years ago Ben bought one but smashed it up when he saw the gear stick had been moved. It was purple.
  • mascot88
    mascot88 Posts: 9,616
    Ben thatcher spent 12 years leaning to become a proffessional pilot prior to heading to Kenya to become a game reserve ranger and protect the big five from poachers.....
  • Off_it
    Off_it Posts: 28,832
    Ben Thatcher once stood in for Mick Jagger at a Stones gig when his voice conked out halfway through "Honky Tonk Woman". The transition was so seemless that he has since filled in on evey tour since 1985 thereby proving that if you try sometimes you just might get, get what you need.
  • Off_it
    Off_it Posts: 28,832
    When asked who, in her opinion, the perfect role model for today's youth is, Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II replied, "That c*** Ben Thatcher, of course - ya flid!"
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    edited July 2007
    In 1989 Ben Thatcher held the WWF and NWA (later WCW) World (USA) Heavyweight Wrestling Champion belts simultaneously, beating Hulk Hogan, Andre the Giant, the Junk Yard Dog, Tito Santana, the British Bulldog and Miss Elizabeth (in a cage match) along the way. He was the first to hold belts in the two most prominent wrestling federations simultaneously. Now he does the odd guest commentary for WWE pay-per-view events alongside Mean Gene Oakerland.
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    Ben Thatcher does all of Chuck Norris' karate stunts.
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Ben Thatcher.
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    Ben Thatcher can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
  • LoOkOuT
    LoOkOuT Posts: 10,853
    Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Ben Thatcher does all of his grocery shopping at B&Q.

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