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Best nicknames you've ever heard

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  • Last week on Peter Crouch podcast. Story of guy called Paul when only at his funeral many friends found out his name was Dave. Apparently had an impressive manhood and many years earlier workmates christened him Paul after referee Paul Alcock famously pushed over by Di Canio.
    There was a kid at our school whose name was actually Alcock.  So he got called Smallcock by everyone.  Not that imaginative but we were all teenagers.

    One of our teachers heard it, and told us that he used to know a guy called Richard William Alcock, so his nickname was Dick Willy Cock.
    I know a John Scott Nobles.
  • Another one was a German bartender, Steffen, we had for a few months in a dive bar in Central London, really good at his job but absolutely coked up to the eyeballs half the time. We changed his name on the rota and tills to Schneemann (Snowman in German) 
  • Had a lad nick named Rivets. That was because he had so many blackheads you would have thought that his head was riveted.

  • A fella that only one person knew before he went on a weekender that included my brother, wouldn’t buy a round even though he took one every time others took their turn. 
     He picked up the nickname Crime and is known by that to this day.
  • I knew someone with the surname Hoy who we called Shipper - doubly appropriate as he was our storeman who delivered.
  • I worked with a girl who had slept with quite a few guys in the office.
    Her nickname was ‘Yo-yo pants’
  • Last week on Peter Crouch podcast. Story of guy called Paul when only at his funeral many friends found out his name was Dave. Apparently had an impressive manhood and many years earlier workmates christened him Paul after referee Paul Alcock famously pushed over by Di Canio.
    Hmmm.
    Despite my username I’m actually a Dave. 
    My other half would say that’s the only relevant coincidence.
  • Last week on Peter Crouch podcast. Story of guy called Paul when only at his funeral many friends found out his name was Dave. Apparently had an impressive manhood and many years earlier workmates christened him Paul after referee Paul Alcock famously pushed over by Di Canio.
    Hmmm.
    Despite my username I’m actually a Dave. 
    My other half would say that’s the only relevant coincidence.
    Not a Davesausagesarnie then.
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