Wearing a baseball cap with the shop sticker still on it
There are fewer more distressing sights than that Of an Englishman in a baseball cap
Was in the Golden Lion in Bexleyheath the other day. An this bloke came up to the bar and said "what's the latest I can wear my baseball cap" " all hats off after 6:30 " said the barman. Hmm....... !
Young thrusting executives who use utterly pointless business speak phrases.
Learnt two new ones in the last couple of weeks "Sheep dipping" and "Horizon gazing".
Just say what you mean.
Wankers.
I'd also ban the word "executive". Anyone who uses that word to describe their job title is a bit of a knob. I'd also ban estate agents using titles they are not entitled to us, like partner or associate. Nearly implies a professional qualification.
And while I'm at it I'd ban the selling of meat from supermarkets. I'd make this macabre product only available from specialist outlets in the back of beyond.
I'd ban all those sickly smelling vapes. If you want a nicotine fix it would have to be sold with the essence of old ash tray. Being serious for one moment, I'm not actually convinced vapes are not harmful and I'm sure these bubble gum flavours are marketed at the youth just like alco pop were in the '90s.
Just read the whole thread, and while I agree with nearly everyone, if I had to pick one that could actually be banned, I’d go with TV betting advertising.
The most annoying part of that is, those adverts ARE banned before the watershed. They allow an exception for when football is on. Which is utterly ludicrous. It’s made me detest the Soccer Saturday mob too, all that mugging to the camera and smug know-it-all “how big’s your noggin” crap. Fuck of Jeff. Your advert is no kind of fun, so maybe you should stop. Grinning prick.
Also, having self-imposed my exile from Sky punditry, I can confirm that if we banned Carragher and co. from TV entirely, we’d all feel better about life.
I think it's fair enough for babes-in-arms, where the parent might need room to open the door fully to detach them from baby seats, but once they are beyond that stage, I don't see why it's necessary.
Anyone who slows down to have a nose at an accident on the other side of the road . You rubber necking bellends , fuck off it’s a flashing light, some poor bastard is in pain but no let’s add half hour on to our journey time by braking and slowing right down so you can have a real good look at a mangled up car and an ambulance and some police cars , fuck off , let’s have a sniper on the side of the road ready to shoot anyone dead who slows down for a look , get em off the road and it will keep our lives moving . Cyclists riding more than 2 abreast and not getting back in line when traffic is about . People who drive up your arse when clearly there is traffic in front and you can’t overtake or go amywhere else , go away you bellend cos one day I’m gonna break real hard and peel you out the back of my car you twat .
Thing is though, if you shoot the rubber-neckers dead then they crash their car, you have to get the emergency services out, and the whole cycle just repeats at a larger scale. You'll have a tailback on the M25 40 miles long of mangled cars and flashing lights. It's almost like you haven't thought this one through seriously
No need to ban them, all drivers of German cars just park in them anyway, it just needs every other able bodied, middle aged man or woman to wise up and tackle the scourge of parents (often, these mugs are alone with their kids too) that just need a bit of extra room to get their kids out of car seats.
Anyone who slows down to have a nose at an accident on the other side of the road . You rubber necking bellends , fuck off it’s a flashing light, some poor bastard is in pain but no let’s add half hour on to our journey time by braking and slowing right down so you can have a real good look at a mangled up car and an ambulance and some police cars , fuck off , let’s have a sniper on the side of the road ready to shoot anyone dead who slows down for a look , get em off the road and it will keep our lives moving . Cyclists riding more than 2 abreast and not getting back in line when traffic is about . People who drive up your arse when clearly there is traffic in front and you can’t overtake or go amywhere else , go away you bellend cos one day I’m gonna break real hard and peel you out the back of my car you twat .
Those are the moments you feel like putting your fog lamp on but can't
Comments
Of an Englishman in a baseball cap
And while you're at it, learn how to say 'Lackadaisical' correctly as well! (e.g. Jim Beglin and Sam Matterface when you're commentating!!!).
Vaping, however should be left alone.
Learnt two new ones in the last couple of weeks "Sheep dipping" and "Horizon gazing".
Just say what you mean.
Wankers.
Can't imagine why this is done.
14 billion ( 2016 ) is the tax that is raised from the sale of cigarettes, and the cost of treating smoking related illnesses is 2.6 billion ( 2015 )
11.4 billion is the amount raised by the government, quite a hole to fill.
"Lets brainstorm" or "Put our heads together" - Just piss off trying to sound clever
Anyone who uses that word to describe their job title is a bit of a knob.
I'd also ban estate agents using titles they are not entitled to us, like partner or associate. Nearly implies a professional qualification.
And while I'm at it I'd ban the selling of meat from supermarkets. I'd make this macabre product only available from specialist outlets in the back of beyond.
Being serious for one moment, I'm not actually convinced vapes are not harmful and I'm sure these bubble gum flavours are marketed at the youth just like alco pop were in the '90s.
The most annoying part of that is, those adverts ARE banned before the watershed. They allow an exception for when football is on. Which is utterly ludicrous. It’s made me detest the Soccer Saturday mob too, all that mugging to the camera and smug know-it-all “how big’s your noggin” crap. Fuck of Jeff. Your advert is no kind of fun, so maybe you should stop. Grinning prick.
Also, having self-imposed my exile from Sky punditry, I can confirm that if we banned Carragher and co. from TV entirely, we’d all feel better about life.