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SouthEastern this Morning

ForeverAddickted
ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,319
in Not Sports Related
There is a trespasser on the line @ Woolwich Arsenal so trains are being delayed @ Dartford as they either go down a different line or are delayed

(Im coming from Gravesend and wanted to go Woolwich yet my train is going fast to London Bridge with no stops)
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Comments

  • Plumstead_Micky
    Plumstead_Micky Posts: 932
    Apparently that trespasser was on the line at 5.30am, but they still didn't know where he was by 7.20, so the station recommended we use the Bexleyheath line. I wonder if they'll find him before tonight's rush hour..
  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,319
    lol! thats just a joke... Took me two hours to get to Stratford this morning after taking the train non-stop from Dartford to London Bridge and then on to the Jubilee Line.

    Very disappointing from SouthEastern that they didn't let people use the High Speed
  • AllLeftFoot
    AllLeftFoot Posts: 1,500
    Apparently a man in a tree near Charlton station.

    Wondering if it's the same bloke that had the police helicopter out at about 2.30 this morning looking for a burglary suspect on the railway track.
  • Baldybonce
    Baldybonce Posts: 9,648
    AllLeftFoot said:

    Apparently a man in a tree near Charlton station.

    Wondering if it's the same bloke that had the police helicopter out at about 2.30 this morning looking for a burglary suspect on the railway track.

    on the branch line?
  • JollyRobin
    JollyRobin Posts: 1,706
    Lawrie Wilson's still on a bender after last nights result then.
  • Riscardo
    Riscardo Posts: 2,337
    http://www.newsshopper.co.uk/news/11405431.Charlton_burglary_suspect_hiding_in_tree_closes_Woolwich_Arsenal_station_and_causes_Southeastern_chaos/?ref=twtrec

    Hes still in the tree
  • Curb_It
    Curb_It Posts: 21,223
    Most read story on that website... jesus. Then the final indignity of being named and shamed in a local rag.
  • Rizzo
    Rizzo Posts: 6,435
    edited August 2014
    Run the fucker over. Or shoot him out of the tree and then run him over.
  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,319
    Nah cut the three down... Claim it needed doing and that they unfortunately didnt notice the poor man sitting up there... Enough witnesses (and police) to back the tree cutter's story
  • ValleyGary
    ValleyGary Posts: 37,981
    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris
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  • Brendan_O_Connell
    Brendan_O_Connell Posts: 8,938
    ForeverAddickted said:

    Nah cut the three down... Claim it needed doing and that they unfortunately didnt notice the poor man sitting up there... Enough witnesses (and police) to back the tree cutter's story

    No, because then the innocent tree suffers.
  • NomadicAddick
    NomadicAddick Posts: 2,114
    edited August 2014
    Riscardo said:



    Hes still in the tree

    I reckon it's David Blaine.
  • colthe3rd
    colthe3rd Posts: 8,486
    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    Not sure whether that is supposed to get him down or off.
  • Huskaris
    Huskaris Posts: 9,849
    He should have to stand at every affected station with a sign saying "I am the guy who messed up your commute on 13/08/14"

    The middle class tutting at Westcombe Park alone would deafen him.
  • Huskaris
    Huskaris Posts: 9,849
    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    Thought this was a very weird thing to say, then I went on the News Shopper website and I am cracking up.

    Poor guy though, maybe they shouldn't have named him.
  • stoneroses19
    stoneroses19 Posts: 7,222
    So one guy kept me awake last night while a helicopter chased him and then this morning a ton of police cars and ambulances arrive at bottom of my road Incase he falls out of a tree.
    Why can't people go and find a job rather than stealing from others.
  • Ormiston_Addick
    Ormiston_Addick Posts: 8,810
    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
  • Shag
    Shag Posts: 4,555
    Maybe the bloke up the tree is Andy Delort ?
  • Brendan_O_Connell
    Brendan_O_Connell Posts: 8,938
    Ormiston Addick said:

    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    It's the truth I tell ya, my wife put the fruit bowl at the bottom of the stairs and I fell down them later that evening.

    The banana and the grapes were eaten by the hamster, but it didn't like the taste of the orange!
  • The Red Robin
    The Red Robin Posts: 26,127
    ForeverAddickted said:

    There is a trespasser on the line @ Woolwich Arsenal so trains are being delayed @ Dartford as they either go down a different line or are delayed

    (Im coming from Gravesend and wanted to go Woolwich yet my train is going fast to London Bridge with no stops)

    It's Simon Church still celebrating from last night and telling the trains to Shhhhhh.
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  • ValleyGary
    ValleyGary Posts: 37,981
    edited August 2014
    I heard it was Bikey walking home and they've stopped all services to protect the trains safety.
  • Heath Hero
    Heath Hero Posts: 1,520
    Ormiston Addick said:

    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    I was at a pub quiz once where one of the rounds was identifying from x-ray pictures the particular items which had been inserted up someone's backside. A Buzz Lightyear toy is the one that seems to stick in my memory.
  • ValleyGary
    ValleyGary Posts: 37,981
    Heath Hero said:

    Ormiston Addick said:

    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    I was at a pub quiz once where one of the rounds was identifying from x-ray pictures the particular items which had been inserted up someone's backside. A Buzz Lightyear toy is the one that seems to stick in my memory.
    "To the intestines…and beyond!"
  • Macronate
    Macronate Posts: 12,892
    Heath Hero said:

    Ormiston Addick said:

    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    I was at a pub quiz once where one of the rounds was identifying from x-ray pictures the particular items which had been inserted up someone's backside. A Buzz Lightyear toy is the one that seems to stick in my memory.
    do you still get a Woody thinking about it?

  • cafctom
    cafctom Posts: 11,371
    Ormiston Addick said:

    ValleyGary said:

    or fire a vibrator up his 'arris

    I read that story, I just can't decide if its tragic or hilarious.

    A friend of mine was an A&E Nurse and she said the things that people would stick up their arses were unbelievable.

    One bloke came in with an entire Orange up his arse and claimed he fell down the stairs after getting out of the bath and "landed on the fruit bowl."
    My whole office has just asked me why I've spent the last 30 seconds howling with laughter. Thank you.
  • Leuth
    Leuth Posts: 23,315
    I was taking a slash and that sheep backed onto me! Repeatedly!
  • The_President
    The_President Posts: 14,280
    ValleyGary - i' read your comment 10 mins ago - and i'm still pi55ing myself at work - my colleagues are wondering why i'm bursting out with spontanoeus laughing.
  • MCS
    MCS Posts: 8,404
    Big question is, is the barst still there?
  • Curb_It
    Curb_It Posts: 21,223
    No he is still up there!
  • ForeverAddickted
    ForeverAddickted Posts: 94,319
    Really hope that he's got one of three things now (Or ideally all three)

    (1) Is Hungry
    (2) Needs the Toilet
    (3) Has an itch he cant get to because if he tries he falls out the tree

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