whenever i do an email requesting some help from our marketing team, i always start the email with 'Ladies' (they are all women btw) - never dawned on me that they might think i'm being disrespectful - how do you address a group of women without naming them all?
I guess everyone should address people however they'd like to be addressed, as a general rule, and that seems to be the issue with changing the name of the team.
i will send them a pre email first next time and ask them
Could you please not use that gendered terminology. Wake up! Please Use the term eMessage
Not sure if that was directed at me, but I’m certainly not offended by anything you wrote.
And yes, the lady thing sounds a bit dumb.
My reply was to Addickhead 86.
You do not perceive that society has changed, I do....otherwise, how could the 'lady' thing have been even entertained as a serious issue worthy of disciplinary action? The fact that it was not only perceived as an issue (given their posting history, I cannot believe that the person involved had any malicious intent in their use of the word; particularly one that has historically been used out of politeness), but an issue grave enough to warrant official reprimand is utterly madness, IMHO;
The way to achieve this is to micro-analyse every aspect of every human interaction so that you find something to feel offended by. Presumably it's the narcissistic warm glow of moral and intellectual superiority that is the reward for such types and keeps them permanently on the lookout for other potential victims.
We used to look up to those who had mental toughness and could rise above such petty bullshit, but now many people in the Western world aspire to be as pathetic, narcissistic and self pitying as possible.
Kids used to aspire to being like Muhammad Ali; now they want to be like Jussie Smollet.
The Western world is fucked; Putin and China must be pissing themselves as they watch our societies falling apart due to endlessly pointless self-inflicted division by a generation that, instead of seeing '1984' as a warning from history, see it as an instruction manual.
Not sure if that was directed at me, but I’m certainly not offended by anything you wrote.
And yes, the lady thing sounds a bit dumb.
My reply was to Addickhead 86.
You do not perceive that society has changed, I do....otherwise, how could the 'lady' thing have been even entertained as a serious issue worthy of disciplinary action? The fact that it was not only perceived as an issue (given their posting history, I cannot believe that the person involved had any malicious intent in their use of the word; particularly one that has historically been used out of politeness), but an issue grave enough to warrant official reprimand is utterly madness, IMHO;
I suppose we'll have to agree to disagree.
Oh, I wasn't offended either, btw. The 'lady' incident happened in 2002 though, so I don't think it's to do with any recent social changes?
I was actually referring to the post where a fellow Lifer was disciplined for using the word 'lady'. Which is fucking insane.
You managed to infer something that I did not say and then find something else to be offended by.
Congratulations, you've just proved my point.
But he wasn't disciplined. You have already created a myth.
As I read it he was hauled into his supervisors office and told not to use the term IN THE CONTEXT HE HAD USED IT.
Nobody says that the term lady should be banned. It is a question of what is appropriate in a specific context.
If the next astronaut to land on the moon was female would it be appropriate to refer to her as the first lady on the moon?
The world has not gone "batshit crazy." Some people are just trying to refer to people in a respectful way and in the way they would prefer. When I was a kid anyone with a disability was called a spastic. but thankfully we have made some progress since then.
The whole language issue is complex as it is nuanced and depends on context. It requires an effort but it isn't impossible to refer to people in the way they prefer. It is a basic politeness at least to try.
I was hauled into a supervisors office back in 2002 when a final year student, for referring to a female client as a 'Lady' and have never used the term since. It was a wake up call and something I will never forget.
Here is the original quote so that posters can make up their own mind. He said nothing about context - that is your own invention. I bet you get all self-righteous when Trump or Boris lies their arse off, amirite?
Still think the world hasn’t gone batshit crazy. Much of it is in our own heads. Bit of change or progress never really hurt anyone. All I was saying was that the outrage is often stirred up or created by tabloids and social media.
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Still think the world hasn’t gone batshit crazy. Much of it is in our own heads. Bit of change or progress never really hurt anyone. All I was saying was that the outrage is often stirred up or created by tabloids and social media.
And wanky people in government with their lunacy. Pregnant "people". Self-identify as pregnant lol
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
Still think the world hasn’t gone batshit crazy. Much of it is in our own heads. Bit of change or progress never really hurt anyone. All I was saying was that the outrage is often stirred up or created by tabloids and social media.
And wanky people in government with their lunacy. Pregnant "people". Self-identify as pregnant lol
Yeah, but even if that sort of thing happens, I just see it as a bit dumb, it doesn’t make me desperately angry. What’s the point of seeking out this stuff in order to be outraged, as some people seem to. And very often things you hear and read about turn out not to be true, like ‘Birmingham council wants to ban Christmas!’, or ‘The EU wants to ban your British Cuppa’ (which initially got me annoyed when I saw it on Facebook. What was I thinking?!)
Still think the world hasn’t gone batshit crazy. Much of it is in our own heads. Bit of change or progress never really hurt anyone. All I was saying was that the outrage is often stirred up or created by tabloids and social media.
And wanky people in government with their lunacy. Pregnant "people". Self-identify as pregnant lol
Yeah, but even if that sort of thing happens, I just see it as a bit dumb, it doesn’t make me desperately angry. What’s the point of seeking out this stuff in order to be outraged, as some people seem to. And very often things you hear and read about turn out not to be true, like ‘Birmingham council wants to ban Christmas!’, or ‘The EU wants to ban your British Cuppa’ (which initially got me annoyed when I saw it on Facebook. What was I thinking?!)
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
The context would be fine if the men's team were known as the gentleman's team.
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
The context would be fine if the men's team were known as the gentleman's team.
This has nothing to do with men or gentlemen. You've taken it out of the context of professional women's sport and compared it to men where a comparison doesn't need to be made and has no relevance.
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
The context would be fine if the men's team were known as the gentleman's team.
This has nothing to do with men or gentlemen. You've taken it out of the context of professional women's sport and compared it to men where a comparison doesn't need to be made and has no relevance.
So in that instance woman is also unacceptable and they need to be known as Charlton Athletic
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
The context would be fine if the men's team were known as the gentleman's team.
This has nothing to do with men or gentlemen. You've taken it out of the context of professional women's sport and compared it to men where a comparison doesn't need to be made and has no relevance.
So in that instance woman is also unacceptable and they need to be known as Charlton Athletic
Still think the world hasn’t gone batshit crazy. Much of it is in our own heads. Bit of change or progress never really hurt anyone. All I was saying was that the outrage is often stirred up or created by tabloids and social media.
And wanky people in government with their lunacy. Pregnant "people". Self-identify as pregnant lol
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
The context would be fine if the men's team were known as the gentleman's team.
This has nothing to do with men or gentlemen. You've taken it out of the context of professional women's sport and compared it to men where a comparison doesn't need to be made and has no relevance.
So in that instance woman is also unacceptable and they need to be known as Charlton Athletic
I was actually referring to the post where a fellow Lifer was disciplined for using the word 'lady'. Which is fucking insane.
You managed to infer something that I did not say and then find something else to be offended by.
Congratulations, you've just proved my point.
It's the way of the world now. A few years back the wife said at her place of work not to say "you look nice today". As my reply could be "are you saying I look bad on other days"
You all realise that anecdote happened twenty years ago? Surely that is no indication of the world in 2022. But some have already run with it as evidence that the world is ending.
Much more likely is that these conversations and incidents have been going on for hundreds of years and every time there's a generation shift, the older generation get grumpy and think the young'uns are being ridiculous. I'm sure it'll happen to most of our generation too in the decades to come.
It's happened before, it's happening now and it'll happen again.
If I'm in a restaurant and want to know where the toilet is, I would ask where is the ladies toilet, it wouldn't even occur to me to ask where is the woman's toilet.
Because in that context "Ladies" is appropriate and no-one is suggesting you use any other term. In the context of a football team it isn't appropriate and our football team doesn't want it.
The context would be fine if the men's team were known as the gentleman's team.
This has nothing to do with men or gentlemen. You've taken it out of the context of professional women's sport and compared it to men where a comparison doesn't need to be made and has no relevance.
So in that instance woman is also unacceptable and they need to be known as Charlton Athletic
You've lost me.
In my simple brain
Gentleman is the same as Lady
Men is the same as Woman
Charlton is the same as Charlton.
Is that not right?
I think you're right to a degree and although I wouldn't want to speak for any women athletes, I am sure they wouldn't have any issue at all about being refered to as just Charlton Athletic.
However, for now, all they are asking for is the baby step that we don't go backwards away from the industry standard which is a shift from "ladies" to "women". In a time when everyone is doing the opposition of the proposed change that TS wishes to implement, I think it's a very foolish hill to die on.
Still think the world hasn’t gone batshit crazy. Much of it is in our own heads. Bit of change or progress never really hurt anyone. All I was saying was that the outrage is often stirred up or created by tabloids and social media.
And wanky people in government with their lunacy. Pregnant "people". Self-identify as pregnant lol
Yeah, but even if that sort of thing happens, I just see it as a bit dumb, it doesn’t make me desperately angry. What’s the point of seeking out this stuff in order to be outraged, as some people seem to. And very often things you hear and read about turn out not to be true, like ‘Birmingham council wants to ban Christmas!’, or ‘The EU wants to ban your British Cuppa’ (which initially got me annoyed when I saw it on Facebook. What was I thinking?!)
Comments
You do not perceive that society has changed, I do....otherwise, how could the 'lady' thing have been even entertained as a serious issue worthy of disciplinary action? The fact that it was not only perceived as an issue (given their posting history, I cannot believe that the person involved had any malicious intent in their use of the word; particularly one that has historically been used out of politeness), but an issue grave enough to warrant official reprimand is utterly madness, IMHO;
I suppose we'll have to agree to disagree.
As I read it he was hauled into his supervisors office and told not to use the term IN THE CONTEXT HE HAD USED IT.
Nobody says that the term lady should be banned. It is a question of what is appropriate in a specific context.
If the next astronaut to land on the moon was female would it be appropriate to refer to her as the first lady on the moon?
The world has not gone "batshit crazy." Some people are just trying to refer to people in a respectful way and in the way they would prefer. When I was a kid anyone with a disability was called a spastic. but thankfully we have made some progress since then.
The whole language issue is complex as it is nuanced and depends on context. It requires an effort but it isn't impossible to refer to people in the way they prefer. It is a basic politeness at least to try.
True.
Gentleman is the same as Lady
Men is the same as Woman
Charlton is the same as Charlton.
Is that not right?
A few years back the wife said at her place of work not to say "you look nice today".
As my reply could be "are you saying I look bad on other days"
Much more likely is that these conversations and incidents have been going on for hundreds of years and every time there's a generation shift, the older generation get grumpy and think the young'uns are being ridiculous. I'm sure it'll happen to most of our generation too in the decades to come.
It's happened before, it's happening now and it'll happen again.
However, for now, all they are asking for is the baby step that we don't go backwards away from the industry standard which is a shift from "ladies" to "women". In a time when everyone is doing the opposition of the proposed change that TS wishes to implement, I think it's a very foolish hill to die on.