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Has the Jokes thread disappeared?

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  • Wife walks in the room to find her Husband screwing his secretary up the arse... "You cant do this to me", the wife says.

    "Its exactly why Im doing it to her" replies the Husband 
  • Someone should give David Beckham a Durex, because it's the only knighthood he'll likely receive.

    (Night hood)
  • Someone should give David Beckham a Durex, because it's the only knighthood he'll likely receive.

    (Night hood)
    That’s terrible .
  • I’m spotting a theme @ForeverAddickted
  • A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich.  He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead.  As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts “Hey, Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and didn’t pay for your sandwich”.

    The panda yells back at the bartender “Hey man, I’m a panda! Look it up”

    The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda:

    A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterised by distinct black and white colouring.  Eats shoots and leaves.
  • A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich.  He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead.  As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts “Hey, Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and didn’t pay for your sandwich”.

    The panda yells back at the bartender “Hey man, I’m a panda! Look it up”

    The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda:

    A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterised by distinct black and white colouring.  Eats shoots and leaves.
    "And don't you dare call me a marsupial."
  • Someone should give David Beckham a Durex, because it's the only knighthood he'll likely receive.

    (Night hood)
    Doesn’t really work when you have to explain the punchline.
    and he will also be knighted.
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  • Trump invites a mate to take a punt on a L1 London club.  

  • Trump invites a mate to take a punt on a L1 London club.  
    "I'm going to win a second term as President".

    "Oh, my aching sides".
  • Am so excited... I've finally got my first job as an Actor in the porn industry and what's more... the woman playing the "wife" is really hot too - Although seems I'm the Husband that leaves home before the plumber arrives!!
    well that was a bit of an anti-climax!
  • I was having hot steamy sex when my Mum's sister walked in on us. Bloody Auntie Climax. 
  • Stig said:
    I was having hot steamy sex when my Mum's sister walked in on us. Bloody Auntie Climax. 
    We all want to hear what happened next.
  • Stig said:
    I was having hot steamy sex when my Mum's sister walked in on us. Bloody Auntie Climax. 
    Did she join in?
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  • Stig said:
    I was having hot steamy sex when my Mum's sister walked in on us. Bloody Auntie Climax. 
    We all want to hear what happened next.
    Had to pull out quick, she was with her friend Curtis Interruptus. 

  • Which famous person does this duck remind you of?
    Oh no. Please no.

  • Which famous person does this duck remind you of?
    Eddie the Eagle?
  • Fumbluff said:

    Which famous person does this duck remind you of?
    Eddie the Eagle?
    More tiresome jokes :smile:
  • Fumbluff said:

    Which famous person does this duck remind you of?
    Eddie the Eagle?
    Eddie Skid 
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